I Want You
by Scarhearted
Summary: It's a story i just thought of. Four guys; four elements. It's a Kames story and maybe later a Cargon story too...maybe. it took forever to write this. Please don't hate if u don't like it :(


I Want You

Rated M for Mature

A Kames Story

(James)

As always, it was a bright and sunny day in Los Angeles; the wind blew a gentle salt-water breeze and warm sunlight was shining down. Even at the Palmwoods, the beautiful rays of the sun shined down on us. It was summer break and everyone was relaxing down by the pool, either swimming or soaking in the sun's light; everyone was having a good time. The Jennifers were all sitting at a table, looking fabulous as ever, scanning the pool for new boyfriends since suddenly but not surprisingly, they were all dumped the night before. Tyler, was doing his regular hide-and-don't-be-seen by his mother thing; I'm shocked that he's still here since he won't go to any auditions. Guitar-Dude was sitting at the edge of the pool, strumming an original song of his own. It was very catchy I'll admit; sometimes me and the guys would sit by the fire and sing to one of our songs, while he played his guitar. One of these days, I bet he'll become a famous guitar player for a band. As I turned my head, I glanced over to my friends; Logan was reading about _Future Doctors of America. _I laughed to myself, being a doctor would be a stupid job in my opinion. Why think about being a doctor, if he's in Big Time Rush? He looked up at me with a questionable look, before I realized he was staring back; he got up and walked over to me.

"Um James, what are you looking at?" he asked.

"Uh?"

My head shot up and I could feel my face turning red from embarrassment. _I hate it when people catch me staring at them; it feels like if they notice, they'll suddenly start judging. My self-esteem had been extremely low the past few days…I don't know why…_

"Uh…n-noth-nothing…I…" I stuttered miserably looking everywhere but him.

Raising an eyebrow, Logan shooked his head and went back to his seat. With one more glance back to me, he went back to reading. As my body began to relax, my eyes shifted to another one of my friends: Carlos Garcia.

He was laying up-side-down in a lounge chair with a half-eaten corn dog in one hand and a pop tiger magazine in the other. And of course, he had his helmet fastened to his head. _I wonder why he always has that thing on. Does he know it makes him look stupid? It's not natural. And he wonders why he doesn't have a girlfriend. Well, I don't have a girlfriend- but that's beside the point…_

He suddenly laughed with amusement, I tilt my head to the side and laid back into my chair; crossing my arms. His eyes scanned the page thoroughly then turn the page and started to scan again. _What is he reading? It's not about us is it? Did the paparazzi discovered something interesting…_

I shifted in my chair uncomfortably, and continued to question the matter. _Could I just ask him? Maybe I shouldn't, he'll probably think I'm being nosy or maybe I should since after all, I am one of his friends and I did a lot worse things than snoop_.

Deciding not to, I glanced over to Kendall.

Kendall.

The one boy who made butterflies flutter in my tummy. The one boy, I ever fell for. I smiled as my eyes were forced to check out every inch of him. His blonde hair was very messy and was soaked from swimming in the pool. It clinged to his head and barely moved. When he smirked his cocky grin, I swear, I could've melted in my chair. I love it when he smiles. Even when he talks back to Gustavo, he gets that cocky grin and my heart stops every time.

I took a deep breath and lowered my eyes down his body. He didn't have a shirt, only swimming trunks. So I was able to sneak a few glances at his chest and stomach. He was in healthy shape, well-toned from all the dances Gustavo been making us do. They've been very intense these past few weeks, guess he wants us trained harder for our concert next October-fest. I could remember the last one; none of the newbie's' notice us- not one! The only ones who came and said hello was Camille, Guitar Dude and…I think Tyler…anyway, I and Carlos were trying our best to get notice, but somehow it always fucked up. Then even took our party supplies! That's not cool.

While, we've been doing that, Logan was doing what-ever in apartment 2J and Kendall was nosing around Jo and her new co-star.  
Suddenly, my heart skipped a beat. My eyes shifted past Kendall and towards the blonde bitch sitting beside him. She was wearing a sexy white tank-top (which is too showy and small for her in my opinion) and pink (too short) shorts. _Was she trying to show her ass? _

Ever since I fell for Kendall last year, I've never liked it when he gets close to a girl. A week before we came to L.A., he was seeing some girl. She was going to our school and was grade lower than us. I can't remember how pissed I was when I found out. Every time I saw them, they were making out; once they went non-stop for fifth teen minutes! I sunken lower into my chair heatedly and bit my lip tightly so I could hush my sudden growl that slipped my lips; even though I think I sorta failed since Logan shot a worried look at me. I smiled at him and he went on to reading his book.

Just to let you in on a little info, Jo is sort of a newbie. Not too newbie-ish but hasn't exactly been here for a while. And I have to admit, I thought she was pretty hot when I first saw her, but then I notice Kendall was drooling over her too and I wasn't having that. So I figured I try to date her instead of him; tell a few lies about him so she won't bother with him, and then dump her. Later that day, she told us she already had a boyfriend. I was relieved for a couple of days until Kendall came home and told us that he was dating her.

Looking back at Jo and Kendall, I noticed they were holding hands. When he kissed her on the cheek, my heart started to feel like it was going to shatter; my breathing deepened and a depressing pressure filled my chest. The lump in my throat grew bigger and tears proceeded to swell up in my eyes till I suddenly felt it began to drip down my face. She giggled and jokingly shoved his shoulder while I sat and stared in disgust.

When I thought it couldn't get worse, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss.

_I can't take any more of this!_

I shot up from my chair and bolted into the lobby, not looking back, not even when I heard the guys calling my name. Tears streamed down my face as I continued to run. My heart racing with adrenaline, my lungs gasping for air. Not once did I stop until I out the hotel and in Palmwoods Park, were many people were enjoy their sunny day with Frisbees and kites. When I came to a halt, I sat down by the closest tree and wept. Covering my face, I let myself bawl till I couldn't any more. Once I was finished, I enclosed my legs into my chest and relaxed my head down. _I hate Jo! I hate her! I hate her! I hate her! _

Why her? She always doing some interview for her stupid show, they barely see each other so why _bother_? Besides, I think she's abit of a skank; Kendall did found her last week making out with a new boy in apartment G9. She said he was coming on to her and she _couldn't _stop him, yeah fucking right! The day he came to the Palm Woods, she was all over him! Hell, I bet she slept with every boy in the hotel!

Stupid skank.

My eyes felt puffy and my face was kind of sticky from tears. Lifting my head sniffling, I notice that the sky was gloomy and people were heading home. _How long was I sitting here_? It couldn't have been that long, could it? Gazing around the park, the area grew chilling and forbidding with silence. The common green grounds wasn't the same friendly park at night, it was very creepy. I sat uneasy, clinging to myself while the feeling of isolation crept upon me. I probably should head home; Mama Knight must be worried sick.

Standing up with a low subdued grunt, I extended my sore arms and yawned. The sounds of grasshoppers flowed the park, calming my uneasy nerves; it's just a park and I've been here many times.

"God, I would kill for a bath." I whined, ruffling my messy hair. "…and a comb"

I hate it when it gets messed up, it takes forever to fix and on top of that, I don't look good with messy hair; okay, I may look good but not as good as Kendall, he always look good with messy hair.

The sudden heart-ache came back into my chest in one painful shot, setting off a whimper in dejection. Oh my god, Kendall. He saw me run out, they all did. What are they going to say when I get back? Knowing Carlos, he'll ask a billion questions; staring at me till I'll answer. He always does that, especially if he thinks I'm crushing on someone. I smirked to the thought, _wonder what he think if he found out I'm crushing on Kendall. _Logan, being the medical and docterly one, he would check me over for scars or bruises. Asking a question or two, not wanting to sound nosy. But Kendall…what would he do? How will he react? _Will he react? _Or would he be too busy with Jo to even notice.

The thought buzzes through my head as I race back to the Palm Woods, my nerves were becoming edgy yet again when I walked into the lobby. Mr. Bitters glanced up with stern look, setting the papers he was working on down and walks out from behind his desk.

"It's past curfew, no loitering in the lobby!" he proclaimed with anger.

I flinched to his harsh tone and almost jumped back when he got close to me. Smiling a weak smile, I nodded my head and made my way to the elevator.

(Carlos)

"That's not fair! You stacked the deck!" I shouted, throwing my cards to the table then jumping from my chair.

"No I didn't, you watched me deal it!" Logan shouted back, setting his cards down.

"Then how do you keep beating me?! No way could someone win four times in a row!"

"Yeah you could, just need to know when to use a specific card at–"

"Oh shut up!" I hissed through my teeth, stomping towards the kitchen.

"Shut doesn't go up!" He roared back.

"Will you guys just shut up?!" Kendall shouted from the living room.

He looked nervous from where I was standing. Just sitting there on the couch, staring at his phone. James has been missing for nearly four hours since he ran from the pool. All of us didn't know why he did, but Kendall swore James was crying. _'He was looking rather worried and tense before he l__eft' Logan said, 'I caught him staring into space several times, his face looked totally blank."_

"James has been gone for hours and all you guys can think about is who's cheating at a stupid card game!"

"Sorry" Logan apologized.

"Yeah man, we're sorry but the stress is just getting to us, we miss him too but he's probably fine, no need to over-react." I explained grabbing bottled water from the fridge.

"But what if he's not? What if he got hurt, you saw his face; he had tears in his eyes! You don't think he's depressed, do you- oh, no! What if tries to kill himself-"

Logan and I watched as Kendall broke down with tears, rambling _what if's _and how we should go search for him some more. He was shaken with anxiety, Logan went and sat by him; trying to calm him down.

"Kendall, don't think like that! James is fine, it's only been four hours; I bet he'll be home any minute." Logan assured him.

"How can you guys be so calmed about this?! Our best friend has disappeared!" He cried.

As Logan tried to comfort Kendall, I stood watching them with pity. _How could this affect him so much?_ It's not like it's the first time James ran away. He has done it million times back in Minnesota. Is it because we live in L.A.? I guess I could understand since we're pop stars now; there are a lot of crazed fans out there. A few minutes past and Logan started to cry along with Kendall. Tears streamed down his face as he pulled him to a firm hug. Logan cried but he never made a noise when he did. Logan was always good at that; silent crying.

When he was little, Logan was bullied all the time at his old school. Being so smart at a young age, he was an easy target for the bigger kids. Abused physically and mentally, Logan came home each day depressed and bruised up. His parents started to notice and soon became very worried. Each day, they would ask him how his day went and if anything was wrong. Not wanting them to find out, he would say he's fine and thought up any story to cover up a bruise.

They knew he was lying, of course; what parent wouldn't? He seemed miserable and would cry every night till he fell to sleep. The next morning of every day, they question him again. Being as smart as he was, he knew they could hear him so with the fear of finding out, Logan taught himself to cry quietly at night. His lips pressed tightly with a pillow clinched in his hands. After a couple weeks, he grew better at it. He could just lie in bed, keeping his emotions bottled up; not letting a noise slip from his lips.

His parents' questions then deceased; not hearing their son's grieve, they thought he was now fine. But the bulling still continued at school, no one knew so no one helped…not until he was fifth teen, his parents decided to move to Minnesota; Logan freed from the abusement.

When he came to our school, he was very quiet and very shy. Not once did he talk nor did he try to get noticed.

Then one day in biology class, our teacher wanted us to do a project with a partner about our favorite animals. And with a stroke of luck, I was partnered up with Logan Mitchell.

Not worried about the project, I decided to figure a way to make him talk instead; I mean, how hard is it to get the boy to talk?

"Hi, my name's Carlos," I spoke with exhilaration as I sat next to him. "What's yours?"

It was a stupid question for me to ask since I already knew his name but it was the first thing that popped into my head. So I just sat and waited for his reply.

He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, crossing his ankles and biting his lip harshly. Eyes wide, not knowing if he should answer or not. He looked at me with a troubled look and I could see in his eyes that he was about to cry.

His face grew red with shame, and then looked away from me and at the chalkboard; eyes scanning the directions for the assignment. I gazed at the boy as I was befuddled at his actions. Is he that shy? He can't be, it's not possible, no one can be that uncomfortable around people. Curiously, I moved closer towards him, only inches away from his face and whispered,

"Hey…hey you!" He jumped then glanced back at me with the mixture of panic and annoyed while I shined one of my cheery yet clueless smiles. "What?"

Unfortunately, he didn't talk and went back to work with a 'huff'; not giving me a second thought. My god, he's a stubborn one.

Before I decided to give up on the plan, another idea came to mind, sending a huge grin to my face.

"What's your favorite animal?"

He said nothing.

"Dude, if you won't talk then I can't help with the project, what's your favori-"

"I like Zebras."

Stunned by his swift response, I sat back in my seat with my mouth gaping. His voice was soft and very shaky, as if he was frightened that I was going to suddenly jump up and hit him. His eyes filled with tears, lip quivering triggering his low self-esteem then lowering his head in shame; going back to work.

Not making a single noise as he did.

I patted his shoulder gently with a weak remorseful smile. But when I touched him, he flinched and looked up at me.

"My favorite animal is a pig!" I said in my once again cheery voice, "we could do our project about them…compare and contrast, you know…Would that work?"

He nodded his head.

"Okay, so let's get to work!" I rooted, "oh and my name's Carlos."

"You already told me that." He chuckled.

"Oh…sorry…" Blushing from my simple screw-up.

He beamed shyly and began to write down facts down about zebras and pigs.

"My name's Logan."

Me and Logan been friends ever since. I would often invite him over to my house; we would play videogames like Grand-theft Auto, The Sims and surprisingly Kingdom Hearts. We would laugh and carry on while the time went by fast. When we're not playing games, we're outside riding biking or hiking to the forest. Logan would occasionally stop and talk about interesting bugs we would come a crossed. _Did you know that when a female and male mantis mates that the female would eat the male's head? _Sheesh, its things like this that makes you thankful for being born as a human and not…something else. Stuff that makes you want to go "eww."

Anyway, days pasted and I decided to introduce him to my other friends; it wasn't easy since he would revert to his quiet self, only smile politely, not saying a word. They smiled back; Kendall giving me a worry look. I told them that he was extremely shy and it would take him a while before he would be comfortable enough to say anything. Understanding, Kendall and James were super nice to him, trying to get him to open up more and to relax.

After a while, Logan began to open up. He told us what happen at his last school and that's why he was so sensitive around others. When he finished, Kendall suddenly pulled him into a hug.

It was surprising, not once in the past have I seen Kendall be so sympathetic to another guy before. He was more of a smart-ass kind of guy. Either he would tell you to suck it up or he won't bother with you at all. Even though he softened up a little now, he still didn't like the touchy, feely feeling.

Our friendship all together grew stronger. We hung out every day, played more video games and somewhere down the line, taught him how to play hockey. He was very skilled with the sport, not once did he let the puck past him as goalie and he scored at least eight shots in a row. We offered him a chance to play on the hockey team every now and then but he would say no every time.

James told him countless times that he was a great player and no one would tease him if he played. Kendall even added that they would pummel anyone that would. Finally he gave in and accepted the offer.

Every night, Logan would go out on the ice, score some points and win a few games. In the eighth game he was in he fell and another player crashed right into him. He got up with tears streaming down his face and head busted open. That moment, I realized Logan was a silent crier.

He was ever since.

A sudden sound made me jump and snapped out of my flashback, I spun around to the front door, it was wide open. James walked in, closing the door behind him. With no word being said, James walked into the bathroom, leaving us frozen astonished and concern.

Kendall was the first to jump up and scurried to the door. He stood in front of it before tapping on it lightly. Logan strolled across the living room to the countertop and sat in one of the orange chairs. His facial features baffled, as if he was deep in thoughts, wondering if he should do something.

Kendall knocked on the door again, this time harder than before. Shuffling sounds echoed within the bathroom, moment's later James head popped out the door.

"What?" he asked softly, almost sadly.

"Where were you?" Kendall asked, his distressed look gone and frustrated one took its place, "You were gone for four hours!"

"Why does it matter?" he spoke drearily, clearly not wanting to talk about it.

"Because we were all worried," Logan replied from behind the counter, twirling his thumbs nervously, "we thought something awful happened."

James glanced over to him then back to an angered Kendall, his sadden more. Holding back his tears, he went back into the bathroom, closing the door then locking it.

"What was that all about?" I blurted out, taking a sip from my water.

Kendall's eyes still glued to the door, he tilt his head in wonder.

"I don't know."

(James)

After I closed the door to my worried friends, I turned around and slid down the door and sat in the floor.

_"What was that all about?" _I heard Carlos shout out, probably confused on what just happened. My head lowered, then rose when I heard Kendall spoke.

_ "I don't know."_

He doesn't know.

_HE DOESN'T KNOW? Doesn't know that my heart was aching because of him or that he was the one on my mind, when the interviewers asked questions about love, desire or any of that mushy bullshit?! I LOVED HIM THIS LONG, AND HE STILL DOESN'T HAVE THE SLIGHTEST CLUE? _

My emotions flamed with anger.

I wanted to sling open the door and just shout at him, grab him by the collar of his shirt, and screaming in his face that he was the reason I ran away, that Jo doesn't deserve him and I do. That I loved him.

But doing it was harder than thinking it, so I didn't.

Minutes pasted, I figured I should take a shower since I was already in here. Stripping my clothes off my body, I turned on the water and adjusted it to the right temperature. The water felt good warm against my skin…relaxing really.

Closing my eyes, I imagined a beautiful beach, don't know why; just did.

The waves moved graciously across the shore, the sand moisten as the water moved back and forth from sea. Seagulls soaring the bright sky, making their little sounds to attract other birds. It was the most beautiful beach I've seen, even though it's only part of my imagination. People acrossed the white-like sand laughed and carried on. Everyone was having fun…everyone except me.

I was sitting by myself, all alone on my red blanket just watching the other people enjoying the beautiful beach.

The hot water poured down my skin, I shifted uncomfortable to the thought, it was my beautiful well thought out beach and I'm not even having fun on it! I grumbled, grabbing the shampoo and massaged it into my hair.

Back to my beach fantasy, I continued to sit on my blanket, eyes wondering across the seaside. Unexpectedly, my eyes stopped on a familiar figure just along the water. His small frame glistened in the sun, making him look like a stunning god with a gorgeous smile. He wore a dark blue shorts and flip-flops but no shirt was on him, his naked chest totally exposed. He was smiling a very cute smile; it seemed to attract many girls so he just decided to just display it for their amusement, unaware that I was enjoying it also. While I was so into his charming smile, out of the blue, he looked right at me. Oh My God.

It was Kendall.

Still smiling, he got up with ease and began to walk over to me. My heart felt heavy and filled with desire; Kendall's body made me weak to the knees as I watched him walked slowly over. Approaching me, he sat down beside me with his cute smile. I grinned back showing my pearly white smile. His hand rose and stroke my cheek gently, sending shivers down my spine. He giggled; still stroking my cheek then cupped my face and kissed me tenderly on the lips. I squealed quietly to myself, shock to his sudden move subsequently I gave in and kissed back.

It was a gentle kiss, felt soft and tasted so sweet. His hands moved from my face and into my hair, lightly pulling it. I whimpered, the kiss deepened and his tongue was seeking entrance to my mouth.

Guessing I wasn't fast enough to open my mouth, his hands dropped and pulled me down to the blanket. I yelped and his tongue shot into my mouth, pressing every sensitive spot he could find; I was writhing to his every touch, my arms wrapping around him, holding him as tightly as I could.

Lifting his head away from me, he pressed pepper kisses to my neck and down my chest. I moaned loudly, my nails clawed into his shoulders. He raised his head instantly, staring into my eyes.

"Hon that hurts…" he whined, rubbing my sides soothingly.

"Sorry." I blushed.

He smiled devilishly, and lowered his head to kiss me heatedly. His hands gripped my hips, brushing his groin against mine, I whimpered again, this time with desperation. He seemed to notice my reaction because he did again, and again, and again. It grew unceasing, sometimes teasingly but then became hard and fast. My length grew hard and pre-cum dripped, I think Kendall's was getting hard too.

Unaware of Kendall's intentions, one of his hands slid down into my shorts and stroked me with marvelously sensations. I cried out with pleasure, my grip tighten on his shoulders, nails digging into his skin earning a lust-filled growl. I thrust into his hand rigorously, wanting more friction between us. He laughed, pulling his hand out of my pants and grasped my chin firmly.

"You want it bad, don't you baby?"

I whined with response, my head dropping to the blanket dramatically; legs wrapping around his waist impatiently. He caressed my hair gently with one hand while the other still had ahold of my chin.

"Kendall…"

"I know James, I know…"

He kissed my chest again, stopping to play with my nipples before proceeding to my desire. It felt so good, so _damn _good.

Pure bliss swept through my body as I leaned against the tiled wall, the image of Kendall getting closer to my member was just unbearable, and it throbbed painfully wanting to be touched. Not waiting any longer, I grasped my length and flicked my wrist fast.

My beach fantasy played in my mind as I continued to jerk myself; the erotic desire was pushing me closer and closer to my orgasm.

"Kendall…"

Fantasy Kendall looked up at me with innocent eyes, lips wrapping around my leaking member then taking all seven inches into his mouth.

"Aaaaaghhhhhh!" I came hard, seed spilling all over the walls.

My knees gave out and I fell to the bottom of the tub, my heading hitting the back wall with a thud.

Pure Bliss.

The water continuously poured from the showerhead, cleaning some the white seed off the wall and washing the soapy shampoo from my head. I laid there exhausted and shaky.

"James, are you okay in there!?"

At first, I didn't respond to the question, my mind was still buzzed a little but after a few poundings on the door, I snapped out of it.

"Yeah, I'm fine- I just fell!" I shouted.

"Okay, be careful! Hey, when are you getting out?"

"Why?"

"Cuz' you've been in there for a long time and it's almost bedtime."

"I'm getting out now." I shouted, getting up and stepping out of the shower, grabbing the closest towel near me.

"Oh and James."

"What?"

"Moms' home and she's pissed."

CH 2

It wasn't one of the easiest nights I'd had before, Mama Knight lectured me for an hour about how wrong it was for me to run away, she would stop once and awhile to shake her head shamefully then go back to her lecture. Carlos, like I predicted, started asking questions non-stop. _Where did you go? Why did you do it? Did you try to kill yourself? _Logan eventually made him stop and they went to bed. Kendall on the other hand, stayed up, watching me cautiously.

"What?" I blurt out, feeling uneasy from his non-stop glare.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you do it?" still staring at me, and crossed his arms.

"Do what?" I said stupidly.

"You know what, why did you run away?"

Panicking, I looked away from him and at the TV. Which was playing some weird show about a girl going to a Performing Arts school…man, why didn't we have one of those back in Minnesota?

"I…I got upset…" I spoke nervously.

"….what did you get upset about?"

"Why does it matter?" I snapped, glaring at him.

"Because you _ran away_," he snapped back, "did one of us upset you?"

"No," I lied. "Just didn't feel like it today…"

He raised one of his bushy eyebrows suspiciously and got up from the couch. I was sitting on other end of it, so he didn't walk far. He lowered to me, placing both hands on each side of me, and got close to me.

"Are you sure or are you just telling a fib?" he whispered.

My heart rate increased as I stared into his beautiful green eyes, holding my breath as he stared back. _Oh, why is he teasing me?! _

"I-I'm s-sur-sure…" I shuddered, leaning back into the orange couch, "W-why would I lie to you?"

"Because you got something to hide…" he smirked, "and I'm going to find out what it is…"

He rose up and wanders to the kitchen, leaving me frozen to the couch, completely frighten.

Gustavo sat behind the glass as me and the other guys sung a new song he finished writing, observing our vocals and pointing out our mistakes multiple times while Kelly scold at him.

"Come on, Gustavo, they were great! Just admit it!" she protested, waving her hands as she talk.

"Carlos, you were flat on the chorus, sing it again and this time get it right!" he roared, obviously not listening to a word she just said.

"Oh come on Gustavo!" shouted Carlos.

"We sung it six times already!" Logan added, "Can we at least have a break?"

"No! Now just go and get you moans and groans out of the way and then get ready to sing again."

We weren't doing that bad, it just Gustavo likes to make us think that. Deep down I think he actually likes us but he doesn't want us to know.

Kendall took a breath and sung his verse of the song then we all chipped into the chorus:

_That's you're looking for boyfriend_

_I see that_

_Gimme time you know I'm gonna be that _

_Don't be scared to come put your trust in me_

_Can't you see all I really wanna be is your boyfriend?_

_Can't fight that_

_Knock me down you know I'm coming right back_

_I don't care at all what you done before_

_All I really want is to be your boyfriend_

When my verse came I sung smoothly as I always did, matching emotion to the lyrics. I sound really good until I looked over to Kendall. He was really sweaty from the dance lessons we did earlier, my voice went to high and I spoke the words miserably. Gustavo stopped the track automatically.

"Um James, _WHY DID YOU JUST SCREWED UP THE RECORDING?!" _

I flinched, stepping back from the glass and bit my lip nervously.

"I d-don't know…I just-"

"YOU JUST? YOU JUST _WHAT_?! DIDN'T FEEL LIKE FINISHING UP FOR THE DAY? YOU WANT ANOTHER HOUR OF HARMODIES, CAUSE I CAN-"

"GUSTAVO! HE'S JUST HUMAN, GIVE HIM A BREAK, WILL YA!?" Kendall shouted into the mic.

"Gustavo, they've been working hard today, please don't criticize them." Kelly begged.

"Fine! Dogs go home; you're done for the day!" He yelled, stomping out of the room. "But I expect you dogs to be here, first thing in the morning; nine a.m. sharp!"

Kelly smiled apologetically and walked out of the room too. Leaving the four of us alone.

"God, why does he always have to be a fuckin' prick to us?" Kendall groaned, stepping out of the recording booth.

"Because we're _his_ dogs, remember?" Logan pointed out.

"Oh really? Last time I check, I didn't have a fuckin' tail!" Kendall snapped.

"Calm down dude, don't let Gustavo get to you." Carlos said, patting Kendall on the back. "Let's just go home and get something to eat, okay?"

"Fine…" he huffed, heading out the door, us following after. "But I'm not hungry…"

Walking home was slow and boring, no one was saying anything and we were nowhere close to the Palmwoods. We should've asked Gustavo if we could've taken the limo home but with Kendall being piss and all, it probably wouldn't have been such a good idea.

"My feet hurt." I blurted out, stopping and rubbing my sore feet.

The other three stopped.

"We haven't walked that long, James…" Logan protested, glancing down at his watch.

"Can we take a break? Pleeeeaaassseee?" I whined.

"Fine…there's a bench over there, come on…" Kendall pointed at the bench and we made our way to it.

I sigh as I slumped down into it. It was hard and didn't feel really comfortable but at least I was off my feet. Kendall sat down next to me, placing each one of his arms on the back of the bench; the right lay behind my back, brushing against me lightly.

"Um…Kendall?"

"Yeah?" looking at me with his beautiful eyes.

Those innocent eyes.

_Kendall looked up at me with innocent eyes, lips wrapping around my leaking member. _The beach fantasy.

I gasped, leaning away from him trying to hide an almost noticeable budge in my pant, and then remembering that I had his attention.

"Uh…oh! Thanks for what you did…back at the studio, I mean…" I babbled.

He looked confused at first but after a minute or so, he realized what I was talking about and smirked his sexy smile at me.

"Oh, it was nothing," he said, patting me gently on the back. "What Gustavo was doing was totally out-of-line. You're welcome, dude."

I smiled back at him with my cute smile, then turn away because I could feel my face turning red.

_Is it getting hot all of a sudden?_

Carlos sat on the curb of the sidewalk, playing with his helmet strap and watched passing cars as they flew by; Logan read a random book he had brought with him. The cover read _Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. _Huh, I didn't know Logan was into that kind of stuff with all the super non-real crap in it. You would think he would just toss it aside and laugh about how ridiculous it was.

I myself was a Harry Potter fan, I've read every book in the series…I just never told anyone. Don't get me wrong, I despise reading as much as the next guy. I would rather do something active then read a stupid book. But when I read one of the Harry Potter series, I'm simply drawn to it. The magical spells and witchcraft are very interesting to me, it's like a mysterious escape were anything could happen.

_I wonder what it would be like to have magical powers…_

I got up from the bench and took a deep breath. My feet felt better so I could be able to walk now.

"Hey guys, I feel better now, we can go."

"No way, we just sat down!" Carlos protested, slinging his head my way.

"Yeah dude, we just got here, we're not moving." Logan added, not looking up from his book.

Kendall simply shrugged his shoulders and lay out across the bench, secretly tormenting me.

"Well, then I'm going to go take a little walk then…" I said, turning and heading off.

"Whoa! No you're not, not after what you did last night!" Carlos dissentered.

"I'm not running off, Carlos! I just go a few blocks then back, alright?"

"You'll come right back….?" He asked suspiciously.

"Yes…"

"Promise?" Kendall asked, looking hurt.

"Yes, I promise."

My shoes pitter-pattered against the conceit as I walked along the sidewalk, humming to one of our catchy songs. People were scurrying to the destinations so fast that hardly anyone notice me; I got a few head nods but that was it. It was one thirty-seven p.m., which means no younger fans would be running up to me any time soon either. I shoved my hands into my pocket, fiddling with the change that was in it and examined the numerous individuals that were roaming the street.

Men and woman in business suits rushing past people with cell-phone fastened to their ears, gabbing as they went. A deli owner stepping out of his shop to offer free samples to oncoming consumers passing by. Sometimes, I saw street performers dancing and singing. A couple had great talent but some…not so much. Then I noticed a stressed out mother carrying a new-born infant in her arms, holding the baby tight in hope that no one would harm it. I smiled with sympathy, gliding past others as fast as I could so I could reach her. She jumped with surprise as I approached her, I even noticed her tightened her grip on the child.

"It's okay." I announced, holding my hands up to show that I mean no harm. "I not going to hurt your baby, Mrs.…?"

"Miss."

"Huh?"

"Miss, I'm not married." She said firmly.

"Oh, I thought since you had a baby in your arms that-"

"-that I would have a _husband_?" she interrupted. "No."

"Well…yeah. Why, did he leave you? Or did you two never get married?" I asked with wonder.

"Neither."

"Then how did you hav-"

"Why would you like to know?" she pointed out, "it's none of your business…"

"Just curious."

"Well, don't be."

"Why? It's not like it's a bad thing to have a child…"

"It is if you didn't plan for it and the bastard who raped me gets away with it and I'm all alone taking care of it!" she shouted.

"What?"

"I was raped, you dim-bat."

I froze with shock, well, didn't see that one coming…

"Oh…I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have bothered you, I'm really sorry..." I babbled.

"It wasn't your fault; you shouldn't have to be sorry."

"Oh…okay…" I said awkwardly, "…did the guy who did it get arrested?"

"No, like I already told you; he didn't." she said sadly, looking at her baby. "The bastard was wearing a mask so I couldn't identify him."

"Surely, the doctors got a DNA sample…"

"No, he made sure I was clean before he let me go." She explained, her face turning brightly red.

"How…how long d-did he keep you?" I asked, very nervous to hear the answer.

"Two weeks..."

"Did he…you know, _do _it to you more than once.

To be honest, I was surprise that she was telling me all this, you would think being a rape victim, she would be all quiet and sensitive like the others that has been in the same situation. Plus, I just met her; does she already trust me that much?

"Only once, the rest of the two weeks, I was locked in the basement."

Wanting to change the subject, she smiled and motions me closer to her so I could get a closer look at the baby.

"You trust me enough to get close to your baby?" I asked.

"Of course, you seemed to be a nice Guy." She laughed, still motioning me to get closer.

Shifting my feet, I got close enough to see, it was wrapped in small blanket so I couldn't actually see it.

"Look, doesn't he look adorable when he's sleeping?" She cooed, brushing the blanket back to let me see him snuggling into her. He yawned a little, making a soft whimper.

_Awwwww, he's so cute!_

"When the guy let me go, he blind-folded me and put me in his trunk…he drove for a while then drop me to the side of the road. I had to walk all the way home." She said quietly, brushing the baby's hair with her finger, "Mom wanted me to get an abortion when she found out I was pregnant but I flat out told her no…" she paused for a second then continued, "just because some shithead is a pervert doesn't mean the baby doesn't deserve to live, right?"

"That's true; the baby didn't do a thing." I pointed out, "What's his name?"

"Aidan Xavier Stark." She said proudly.

"Well Miss Stark, your baby is very beautiful." I said smiling at the sleeping baby, "…can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why are you telling me this? We just met…I could probably be a mugger or something and you wouldn't even know it." I pointed out.

"Don't be silly, I know you wouldn't do that…"

"How do you know?"

"You're James Diamond from Big Time Rush, aren't you?"

"Yeah…"

"That's why…I know you and the other guys are sweethearts."

"Hon, if you knew us, you would know that we are far from sweethearts…"

She laughed,

"But I am very handsome; it makes up for not being a sweetheart, right?"

"Ehhh…I kind of more into Logan to be honest…"

I gasped dramatically, and then crossed my arms.

"Well…"

"Don't worry James, you're still very handsome…" she giggled.

I smiled,

"Hey I'm going the hospital, would you like to come?" she asked.

"I wish I could but I can't. I'm on a short leash right now; my friends would be pissed if I take off again." I said apologetically.

"Oh I understand, my mom does that too…she pulled me out of school because I was always late home, she worried that I would get kidnapped or something."

"I figured you were minor, how old are you? Seventeen…eighteen?"

"I'm seventeen, will be eighteen next month…well, I got to run or I'll be late for his check-up."

"Okay see ya!" I said as I waved good-bye to her when she vanished into the crowd. She seemed to be such a nice girl and I didn't even get her first name…

I sighed, _well, I guess I should head back to my friends before they freak._

Starting to head back, I heard a sudden crash behind me. I jumped then turned with suspicion, and gazed down a dark alley that I didn't even notice till now. Chills ran down my spine, and something about it didn't sit right. I decided it was probably just some animal getting into something. _Probably nothing._

I walked a few steps before I heard a feminine cry echoed from the alley, I jumped again with fright and looked around.

_Did anyone else hear that?_

The scurrying people seemed to not have notice because not one stopped. Panic filled my chest, as I glanced back to the alley. _What if it was that girl I met with the baby?! A mugger must have grabbed her and pulled her into the alley! He could kill her and her child!_

I dashed into the darkness of channel, not stopping until I came closer to sounds of others' struggling.

"Give them back, you monster!" a woman shouted, striking a much larger man with a crowbar.

He snarled and punched her in the face, sending her flying into a mixture of tattered boxes. It wasn't the girl with the baby but it was another female, who I guess, was trying to get something back that was her's.

She got back up and wiped the blood from her mouth; her beautiful red wavy hair brushed against her wounded face and she pulled it away gently. The man raised his fists fierce fully, as if he was getting ready to fight. But then lowered them when the redhead smiled wickedly.

"What the hell are you smiling about?!" he shouted angrily, "you still don't have them…"

"Oh but I think I will in the matter of time, or at least a new owner will…" she spoke frightfully.

"Oh really? How's that, bitch?" he roared.

"You'll see when the time's right."

"Fuck you, the elements belong to me!" He yelled, "I have them!"

"Yes, but you won't for long…" she pointed out.

I kneeled behind a dumpster as I listened to their conversation; first off, I was shocked that this woman was shooting back comments to this large man that punched the hell out of her while ago, second, what the fuck are they talking about _owning elements_? _And what does she mean the new owner will have them?_

"Will you shut up, I'm tired of your fucking talking" he bellowed, than raising his hands.

I screamed in silence as I watch a burst of flames came from his hands, it grew larger and larger as he extended his arms out. His evil grin spread across his face.

"Now die!"

Unaware of what I was doing, I grabbed the closest object near me and charged at the man, aiming to strike. He cried with pain as I stricken him in the side, the ball of fire went out instantly as he fell to the ground, gripping his side in agony. He growled harsh fully, staggering to his feet then looking at me.

"Do you want to die, boy?" he hissed, still gripping his side. "Cuz' you're asking for a death wish…"

I gripped the weapon tightly, settling into a fighting position showing that I wasn't afraid. He laughed,

"Oh, so you think you're big and bad don't cha?

"Leave her alone." I growled.

"Boy, she doesn't need your help, so run along to your mommy…" he snickered, turning back to the woman.

"I said, _LEAVE HER ALONE!" _I screamed, striking at him again.

The giant turned swiftly, snatching the entity from my hands then tossing it to the side. His eyes piercing me like daggers, and his face went scarlet red.

He looked pissed.

"You little fucker, I told you to go away, this is not your fight!"

"I not going to let you hurt her!" I protested, raising my fists, "besides, haven't your mother ever told you it's not _gentlemen-like _to hit a lady?"

"Trust me; this bitch is no lady…"

"I beg to differ, Mr. Walker…" she spoke, her voice was light as air and sweet as honey. "I can be a lady when needed to be."

He snarled viscously at the red hair but kept his eyes on me. The woman sighed and looked at me; she smiled then held out her hand to me. Confused, I stood there motionless. _Does she want me to take her hand or something? _

"Its okay child, I won't harm you…" she glanced at the walker-guy, "…why would I, when you'll be the keeper of the elements?"

Mr. Walker's eyes widen, shifting to my direction then snarled again. I gulped, taking a few steps back as he began to approach me.

"You?! Destined for the elements?! HA! Destined for death is more like it!" He laughed, "I'm going to bury you alive…"

He slowly outstretched his hand and raised it. The ground below me gave way and I fell into a small hole with a sharp painful yelp. I could hear him laughing from above as I got to my feet. My legs felt sore from the fall, and so did my head when it hit the ground. _God, I'm sore all over…_

Mr. Walker's laughing ceased, and fear shot through me as his huge feet shuffled across the surface and towards the opening of the hole. _He's going to kill me! Oh god, I'm going to die! _

_I'm going to die!_

_I'm going to die!_

_I'm going to die!_

_Play dead._

I jumped as the voice popped into my head, _who said that? Am I going crazy?_

_Play dead, trust me; he won't bother you if he thinks you're dead…_

Quickly as I could, I fell to the ground and laid still. And as on cue, Mr. Walker was above the hole, staring down at my pitiful body.

"Damn…guess I'd kill'em…" he smirked, "Sorry 'bout you're luck Kiley, the boys' dead…"

"Yes, a shame indeed…he would have been perfect keeper…"

_A perfect keeper? Is she still talking about the elements…?_

A sudden thought came to me, and I swear, I could've scream in terror if I didn't have to play dead.

_Mr. Walker has the elements…_

…_Earth…._

…_Air…Fire…_

…_and Water…_

_The fire coming from his hands…the ground crumbling under me…is that what's she's talking about?_

_Whoa, it would be awesome to have those powers…_

"Well, with him outta the way, I guess I could finish you off now…" he said venomously, retreating from the gap of the crumbled earth. "Get over here, you bitch…"

"Very well then."

Sounds of crashing and fight fired up as I laid in the hole frozen in place, thinking whether I should stay and help or run for dear life. Worried that the man would see me, I cautiously sat up, avoiding any sudden noise that would signal that I was alive.

_Don't move._

I froze immediately once I heard the woman's voice. Laying back down swiftly, I laid back into the familiar connection of the loose soil beneath me, smearing onto my arms and lucky shirt. Grumbling with disapproval, I continued to listen to the enduring fight from above. The sounds of punches being thrown and objects clashing into each other; each time it would boost my fear higher and higher. Loud sounds of fire being thrown to a gust of wind flying by, all too abnormal…too supernatural…

_Man, the guys are going to freak when I tell them this, Logan's going t-_

Oh no…

_The guys…how long have I been gone? I need to get outta here, they probably are searching for me right now…what if…_

What if they came here…the man would see them and surely kill them, I need to get outta here; I have to.

A unexpected shriek from above snapped me from my thoughts, it sounded agonizing as the person fell to the ground and a moment of joy came but soon went away when I realized that the cry wasn't Mr. Walker, it was too…feminine.

The woman, she's losing.

"Ha! I told you, you wouldn't defeat me!" the man laughed viciously, "did you think you would actually win?! While I had access to all four of elements?"

She screamed as the man slapped her fiercely, he laughed again. I drew my breath sharply as the sound of the man grabbing her harshly by the arm and pulling her up to stand made her cry out in pain.

"Beg you stupid bitch!" he shouted, she let out another cry as he hit her again.

"I…don't beg…to worthless men…such as yourself…" she gasped, hoping to fill her lungs with air.

"Won't beg, uh?" he hissed, "then I'll make you beg!"

The blows echoed through the ground, my blood boiling with every punch he gave. Gritting my teeth harshly, I shot up from my spot and crawled towards the edge of the hole.

_Don't move! _

_No. If I don't help, he could seriously kill you!_

_That's not important, what's important is that you're safe an-_

_Not important!? What the hell is wrong with you! _

_Please you have to listen to me! If he knows that you're alive, he'll-_

_No, you listen to me! I'm not just going to lie in a fucking hole and listen to some bastard beat the shit out of a woman when I know I can do something about it; if you think I'm a coward then you're sadly mistaken, now shut up!_

Few minutes pasted and the redhead didn't say a word, _guess she knew that she wasn't going to change my mind so she gave up._ I crawled out the hole quietly, looking straight at the man; he was now standing over the unarmed woman. I grabbed the crowbar the woman had earlier and darted towards the giant with weapon in hands.

It was all a blur, I ran swiftly and struck him remorselessly in the back of the skull. He fell to the ground immediately after the first blow. Shaking his head, he tried to get back up. But I struck again…and again…and again, I fastened my pace and the crowbar came down harder and faster. Blood spilled from his head, covering the ground and the oncoming crowbar with its sticky texture. My face soon after was covered. Mr. Walker crumpled to the ground and took every hit; at first he struggled to get away from me but then his movements lessened and he fell to the ground; making no movements at all. He was dead.

"James!"

Oh no…

CH 3

"James stop!" another voice screamed from behind with horror.

I dropped the crowbar instantly, _it was all too much. _Tears filled my eyes as I staggered back away from the blooded corpse; a panicky feeling filled my chest when I noticed his splattered blood was on me. I screamed in terror as I tried to smear the disgusting fluid off my skin, _it won't come off!_

"Aaaaaghhhhhh! Get it off me! Get it off! Please!" I scream hysterically, still trying to wipe it off me. "Please!"

Hands wrapped around me and began to rock me lightly. I struggled to get away from the grasp but it unfortunately kept a firm grip on my waist. I had to finally give up on the idea.

"Shhh…James, it's alright, calm down. Shhh, it's okay… "

It was Kendall's voice that saying all the soothing words, his arms wrapped securely around my waist, leaning into his warm body against mine. I swear, I would've fallen to the ground if he didn't hold onto me so tightly. I became calm and lean into him; he laid his head on my shoulder and continued to whisper calming things into my ear. All so calming…all so enjoyable…I started to relax.

"Kendall…"

"It's alright, I'm here…" he whispered, tightening his hold on me, "I'm not going to let go, I promise…"

Carlos and Logan came closer to us and looked at the dead body in shock. His head was completely bashed in from the crowbar; he laid there stiffly in an uncomfortable position. Logan gasped in shock as Carlos tilt his head in confusion.

"James…you killed him…"

I knew I killed him, I mean, look at him; he has a fucking hole in his head. It can't get simpler then that…I'm just surprised that I caused it…

"Logan, I think he's in shock, we need to get him home." Kendall spoke worriedly.

"And just leave the body?! The police will find it!"

As I listened to the two of them bicker back and forth about the situation, I noticed something, something that was here before…

…

…where's the redhead…she's gone, where did she go?!

I scanned the whole alley but there was no trace of her. Panicking, I started to struggle to free myself, whining when Kendall refused to let go.

"Where is she?! Is she okay?! Help me find her!" I cried, trying to pull away from Kendall's arm in order to look for her.

"Whoa James, calm down! There's no one here but us…" Kendall said assuring, then looking down to Mr. Walker. "And what's left of your dead friend…"

"No, she was here, I know it! You got to believe me, I swear she was here!"

"He needs to calm down; we don't want people knowing we're here!" Carlos hushed.

"We have to get rid of the evidence, if police find it, James will go to jail for life!" Logan added.

"Oh my god…"

We all looked at the corpse and gasped.

It began to incinerate along with the blood on the ground and the crowbar…all of the evidence…gone…

"How did it….?"

"Guys, let's get outta here…" Logan said shakily.

When came through the door of apartment 2J, Kendall still had his strong arms wrapped around me, he was literally carrying me as an insecure child who just seen death,…

…oh…oh yeah…

"Just lay him on the couch, right here…" Logan said, pointing at the seat of the couch.

_Nooo, I don't want to lie on the couch; can't I just go to bed?_

Kendall rested my head gently on a cushion then went to take my dirtied new shoes off, I just stared at the ceiling; not wanting to make eye-contact with any of them.

"Are you sure he's in shock?"

"Most likely, he hasn't said a word since we left the alley."

"Did you see what happened to the guy's body?!"

"We all seen it, Carlos; we were there, remember?"

"I know but what happened was…strange."

I could hear them all talk from the kitchen but since I was looking at the ceiling I couldn't see what they were doing. They were moving I know, I could hear their feet shuffle along the floor especially Carlos. _The guy really needs to learn to pick up his feet when he walks._

"Maybe he didn't disappear; maybe it was just our imaginations…"

"But we all saw it Logan, it can't be _just our imaginations…_"

"And why did James kill him? Is he crazy?"

"He said something about a woman being there before, did any of you guys seen a girl?"

"No"

"No one was there but us."

"Maybe James just went nuts."

"Carlos!" both Kendall and Logan shouted.

"What?"

"Just forget about it…let's see if James is okay enough to tell us what happened."

_Nooooooo, I don't want to talk, I just want to go to bed…_

"James? James, can you hear me?"

"Of course he can hear you, his eyes are open!"

"Carlos, cool it…"

Their faces became visible, and they all looked worried. I know they're disappointed about what I done but they don't know what happen…they don't know what I've been through…

Kendall took my hand and caressed it with his; making me wants to cry even more because of the simple fact that he saw what happen. Tears yet again, started to row down my face. I heard him give out a soft whine then felt his thumb wipe my tears away. I sniffled, looking up into his sad eyes; he smiled back at me.

"I'm sorry…"

"It's okay James…but why did you do it?"

"He was hurting her."

"Who?"

"The girl, she was there before you guys came; he was hurting her real bad, punching her and everything…he was even going to kill her…"

"What did she look like?"

"She had red hair…was really pretty too."

"Is that it?"

"I think he called her Kiley…"

"Kiley?" Carlos asked.

"Yeah, he even threw…" I stopped. _Should I tell them about the elements? _

"He threw what?"

"Uh…" I sat up on the couch, "the crowbar…the one I had, he was using it on her…I took it away from him and I guess when I was hitting him, she ran away…"

They stared at me blankly, not saying a thing which made an awkward silence.

_I hate awkward silences, I really do._

"Are you sure that happened?"

"Yes."

"How did you know _they_ were in the alley?" Carlos asked.

"I was talkin' to this girl who was taking her baby to a check-up and when she left, I headed a girl scream in the alley. I thought it was the same one I was talking to earlier so I went to go check and it was Mr. Walker and Kiley…"

"Mr. Walker?"

"That's the man I killed."

"Who did you killed?"

We turned towards the door and Mama Knight and Katie were standing there, looking at us.

We looked at each other than back at them,

"Uh, we…uh…"

"Well?" Katie asked with usual smart-ass attitude.

I love her, I really do…but her attitude I can live without, children her age shouldn't be this cocky. Heck, she even arrogant around the hotel manager, Mr. Bitters. Don't get me wrong, I hate him as much as everyone in the building but I don't want to get thrown out by her smarting off to him.

I looked over to Kendall for help, he smile weakly as he looked at his mom with his innocent eyes.

"Oh, this new game, James and I are playing…its really awesome…you should play it sometime…" Kendall lied, flashing a sweet smile.

_Why must life be so cruel?!_

"Why is James covered in blood?" Katie asked, crossing her arms.

"It's fake blood, we were playing…Dungeons and Dragons, you know…the game were people act it out and everything" Logan replied, scratching his head pathetically.

"You mean the game, _nerds _play?"

"Uh…yeah, it's actually fun…and we know you think its dangerous mom but we really wanted to try it…"

"Well, don't play it again; someone died playing that game and you know I don't like it." Miss Knight said, going into the kitchen and taking some food out of the fridge. "James, go get cleaned up."

"Y-yes...Mam…"

I struggled to my feet and walked to the bathroom hastily, almost running into the door since I was walking so fast. I smiled back at Miss Knight then stepped inside.

Ever since Gustavo redid our apartment, I and the guys didn't all have to share a small bedroom. We got another bedroom and now I only have to share a room with one person; Kendall.

When I was done with my shower, I stepped out of the bathroom almost getting run over by Carlos, who I guess needed to pee real badly. No else was in the living room so I didn't have to stop to answer any more questions. I just went ahead to my room so I could _finally_ go to sleep.

I opened the door and walked in to find Kendall sitting on _my_ bed, staring right back at me.

_Oh, come on…is sleep too much to ask for?!_

"Hey Kendall…" I said uneasily, walking over to my dresser to pull out my pajamas, "…getting ready for bed?"

"Not quite…"

"Why's that?" I asked, discarding my towel and tossing it to aside. "It's almost eleven…"

"Because I think you're not telling us all what happen at the alley…"

"What makes you think that?"

"You acting really nervous, like you're hiding something…" he said with no emotion in his voice, "Are you sure nothing else you forgot to tell us?"

"No."

"No?"

"Yeah, no. Why?"

"Because your story doesn't add up: you said you only killed the man because you were protecting a girl…but there wasn't any girl."

"She was there!" I snapped, "She must've run off."

"But James, we were there when you picked up the crowbar, we saw you whack him in the back of the fuckin' head and there was no girl! If you said she ran off, she must've did it before you decided to beat the fuck out of him and if she did, why did you hit him, huh? WHY?!"

"Kendall, can you just drop it?!" I snapped again.

"Why? So you can just get away with killing that guy?!"

"I didn't plan on killing him, Kendall!" I snared, sending him a death glare, "I was only protecting-"

"Protecting who?! A girl who wasn't even there?!" Kendall roared, jumping off the bed.

"She was there! I saw her, if you don't believe me then that's your problem not mine!"

"_I'M NOT THE ONE WHO KILLED A GUY; YOU'RE THE ONE WITH THE PROBLEM!" _Kendall shouted, grabbing my wrists. "_NOT ME!"_

His clasp around me tightened, sending jolts of pain to my wrists and making me yelp in pain.

"_KENDALL!"_

_ "YOU THINK THAT JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN MAKE UP A STUPID STORY THAT YOU'LL JUST GET AWAY WITH IT?!"_

_ "I'M NOT LYING!" _I cried, wrenching away, trying to free myself.

_"THEN WHERE'S THE GIRL?!"_

"_LET GO OF ME!"_

_ "OR WHAT?! YOU GOING TO KILL ME TOO; WE ALL KNOW YOU'RE CAPABLE OF IT!"_

I pulled at his grasped but he wouldn't loosen his hold, I tugged and yanked but he just wouldn't let go. I shoved him forward harshly, causing him to stumble backwards but he remained his hold and balanced himself. Before I knew what was happening he fought back, pushing me against the wall and tightened his grip on me.

"KENDALL, YOU'RE HURTING ME!" I cried.

His eyes widened with shock, the anger left and regret filled them. They looked almost…sad.

He relaxed his hold on me then let go; I withdrew my arms swiftly, pulling them into my chest. Whimpering to the soreness, I lowered my head and cried to myself; not wanting to look at Kendall's angered eyes.

"I…I didn't mean…"

"Kendall, leave me alone."

Nothing happened at first; he stood there in front of me doing nothing while I cried. A few uncomfortable moments pasted with nothing being said, he just sighed then went to his bed without speaking a word.

I looked up and Kendall was already in bed, covered up and _fast to sleep_. Avoiding another fight, I slipped into my Pjs and crawled into bed; covering myself completely with my blanket.

_Oh Kendall…_

I would've told him the truth if it didn't sound like total bullshit. _I mean, would anyone believe a man shooting fire out of his hands? Please, I wouldn't have believed that! _They would think I was crazy and I'll be sent off to the loony-ben. _Wait, maybe I should consider that; better than jail…_

And besides, Kiley ran off; it wouldn't matter anyway. _Why would she just leave me like that? I helped her, I saved her from the cruel bastard who was beating her, the least she could do is back me up. Did she get mad when I didn't listen to her? Because I told her to shut up? Would she really do that to me? And what about this keeper of the elements, she said 'I'll become it'. How can I if I'm in prison? _

_God today was just not my day._

Kendall's phone went off, making me jump a little as I listen, Kendall groaned as he got out of bed and grabbed it off his bed-side table. It rung a couple more time before he answered.

"Hello…oh, hi Jo."

He walked acrossed the room and leaned against the door; I lay in my bed quietly so I could look like I was sleep, not making a noise or moving a muscle.

"I'm sorry about the date; I was kind of in the middle of something…"

_Hee, Hee. Jo got stood up…_

"I know, I know and I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you, I promise."

Fuck.

He scratched his head, and looked at me. Luckily, since I was covered up, he couldn't see me looking back at him. He groaned, and turned to look at the blank wall.

"I was helping a friend…James, he was…he was stressed about something and we tried to calm him down…it work…"

Silent moment to Jo gabbing on the other side of the phone.

"I don't know, he didn't tell us…about a Cuda product maybe…"

_Oh good one; tell her that! _

"He's asleep now, so I think he calmed down…I don't know, we got into fight while ago…"

_DON'T TELL HER ABOUT THAT! _

"I was being stupid and got carried away…I know, it was reckless and I apologize tomorrow…"

_I still hate her, her and her sweet girl acts…Actress remember?_

"Yeah, love you too…"

Gag.

"Later, babe."

_Babe?! When the hell did they get on the nickname basis?_

He hung up and shoved his phone in his pocket.

"God, I'm a screw-up."

_I'm okay with screw-ups, just come and lean on my shoulder; I make you feel better…Babe, heehee…_

He walked out the door, leaving me unsurprisingly heart-broken and disappointed. _Why is it that when I hook-up with girls, it's a breeze but when I try to get with at least one guy, it's a bitch? Is getting with Kendall so bad!? _

I sat up, slinging the covers aside and swinging my feet to the edge of the bed. Getting out of bed was a bitch, because my body was still sore from the fight. I rubbed my shoulders gently, and walked over to Kendall's side of the room.

My usual trips over to Kendall's side always cheered me up, I find all sorts of interesting things.

It was messy, as always, when I stepped over to his side. The floor was covered with clothes, letters from Jo (_Yuck, note to self: step on every letter you come acrossed._) and Hockey gear. I smiled when I saw a pair of Kendall's briefs handing on bed frame. I picked it up and examined slowly as a dirty thought came to mind. _Wonder if he'll noticed their gone? _I chuckled, and turned them over to the front. I froze at the sight of them: they had a huge white stain on them!

OH…MY…GOD…

Kendall came in these boxers! I would have never thought Kendall would jerk-off…never, not once. How would he be able to do it on our tight schedule? And with me popping in and out all the time…

…!

He must do at _night_ when all of us are in bed! Man, I need to stay up a little longer more just so I could see that! _Oh, how much fun will it be to watch your crush lay in bed with his hand wrapped around his cock and pleasuring himself! _

_YUM!_

Maybe he'll do it tonight…maybe he'll do it every night! I did hear a noise on his side of the room last week but I thought it was just my imagination.

I tossed them under my bed for later.

_Looking through Kendall's stuff is fun!_

Cautiously, I walked over to his nightstand and opened it. It was filled with love letters from Jo.

_God, how many letters can the girl write?!_

I pick one up and unfolded it.

_Dear Kendall,_

Oh god, here we go.

_Today has been a wonderful day; I loved the picnic dinner you made me. It was very delish! I loved the cherry pie you made me-_

Ha! He didn't make that pie, the boy can't cook! I was with him when he bought it, guess he _forgot _to tell her.

_-you made me; it was sweet just like you._

Very cheesy.

_Oh, did you know that I know how to tie a cherry stem in to a knot with my tongue? My cousin taught me when I was 13._

Whore.

_Anyway, I really adored what you did and I hope we could do it again sometime._

_ Love ya,_

_ Jo_

By sometime let's hope _Never. _

I tossed it back into the draw, not bothering with the others; they're probably same as the first one anyway…

Posters were all over the walls, from Katy Perry to the gorgeous Lady GaGa…and of course, Big Time Rush. Kendall loves posters; he said that they show your personality and what type of things you're into…it tells what kind of person you are. He always buys the _Pop Tiger _magazines just so he could get the posters. I myself have done that…a mini poster of Kendall is under my mattress now as we speak.

I examined each and every poster before I plopped down onto Kendall's bed and breathed in his scent from the covers. It smelled of man body spray and sweat, all the glorious smells of Kendall Knight. I exhaled slowly, not wanting to release his fragrance just yet.

The blanket was cool and comforting against my skin; I held it close and sat quietly to myself, thinking of what will never be…Kendall and me…

"James?"

"…"

"James, are you okay?"

"Huh?"

I looked up and stared into beautiful green eyes.

"Are you okay, you seem spaced out…" Kendall said softly, sitting next to me, brushing against my leg.

OH MY GOD.

He is wearing nothing but a towel!

"You took a bath…" I said blankly.

"Shower actually, didn't feel like taking a bath…" He pointed out, "…are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, just feel alone…"

"Why?"

"Don't know." I lied.

He looked at me for a second before he leaped from the bed and over to his dresser, I watched quietly as he ruffled through the top drawer, taking out a pair Pjs.

"Do you think you'll be able to sleep tonight?" He asked randomly, striping off the towel.

"I…I don't…know…" I babbled, staring stupidly at his round behind. "Too stress to sleep."

He turned around, pulling on his Pjs bottoms; only giving me a glimpse of his length.

_Why does life have to be so cruel?!_

"Too stressed?"

"Yeah, and I don't want to be alone…I'll probably stay up tonight and watch TV with Mama Knight, she always does that when we go to sleep."

"No, Gustavo will kill you if fall asleep during one of our recording sessions." Kendall warned, falling to the bed. "You could sleep next to me tonight if you want…"

"What?" I looked at him with full attention.

"You don't have to if you don't want, I was just offering!" He said quickly.

"You would let me sleep with you?"

"If it helps you relax with your…_stress."_

He lay back against his pillow, moving slightly over so I could have so room. Kendall smiled and patted beside him, motioning me to lie down too. I blushed horribly and got into bed too. He pulled the soft covers over me, almost laying on top of me while doing it, and laid back down. It was a little awkward at first; we just lay there staring at the ceiling, not saying a word. _Maybe it's because he sleeping with me…does he not want to? Does he feel uncomfortable? _I looked over to him and he did the same, he smiled friendly back at me and I gave him a sweet smile. He laughed.

"Are you feeling better now?" He chuckled.

"Y-yeah…" I said shyly, "Do you feel comfortable doing this?"

"Yeah I guess, it not bothering me." He said, "Is it bothering you?"

"No…it's actually comforting…I mean, since I'm not alone and I feel safe."

Half of it was the truth, I did feel safe and it was comforting but it wasn't because I felt _alone_…it was because I was with Kendall! I'm lying in bed with Kendall! Oh my god…either this must be a very good dream or I'm on something. He makes me feel safe…he very comfortable to be with…he the kindest man, I've ever known.

"Well good." He yawned.

"Kendall…"

"Yeah?" He said with another yawn.

"Can I tell you something?"

"….what…"

"Will you promise not to get mad?"

"….yea…"

"Well, it's a secret I've been hiding for a while now, no one knows about it…and I will really appreciate it if you don't laugh about, 'kay?"

I look over into the distance, not wanting to look at him when I tell him.

"….yea….."

"I been going through…some changes and I'm afraid how people will react when I tell them."

"…"

"I…I'm ga…Kendall, _I'm gay_…"

"…"

"And that's not all…I've been crushing on someone too." I whimpered, "I know this is going to shock you and I beg you not to hate me when I tell you, okay?"

"…"

"I have a crush on…you…I have a crush on you, Kendall."

Silence…fear build in my chest instantly, _is he shock? Is he ignoring me?! _

"Kendall?"

Nothing. God, please don't let this change anything between us.

"Kendall, are you listening to me?!"

…

"I just told you I'm gay and I like you….and you're just ignoring me?!"

Still nothing.

I turned to look at him, to see his embarrassed eyes.

"Kendall, I love yo-"

He was asleep.

Oh my god, I just opened up to him and He. Was. Asleep. There was a black tint under both of his eyes, guess he's been having a hard time sleeping. And after what happened today, I wouldn't blame him.

He looks like an angel though…his face is calm and beautiful in the dimmed light. I listened to his light breathing for a while. Every now and then, he would make a funny face and twitched his nose.

I smiled at him and caressed his cheek softly, he's so cute when he's asleep. Kendall whimpered to the touch, nuzzling into my hand; breathing hot air against my wrist.

_Awwwww, how cute!_

I giggled at his reaction, stroking my thumb against his cool skin, I leaned forward and kissing him on the lips with tender care. Pulling back, he moved slightly with a silent moan. I laid my head on his shoulder, loving his touch and warmth.

"I love you Kendall…"

Knowing I had Kendall beside me, I slipped into a calm sleep.

CH4

(Kendall)

Birds were chirping when I woke up, I was still tired so I didn't bother getting up just yet. Who would? My bed was comfy and the cool air made the blankets feel soft to the touch. _I love that feeling, especially in the fall. It's cool but not cold enough to freeze your ass off. I wish it was fall every season. I hate the winter, it's too cold to do anything…wait, I live in L.A…I don't have to worry about winter…sweet. But I don't exactly like summer either, too hot. That's why I like fall, not too hot and not too cold…and how did I get on this subject? _Lying in comfort, I pondered my thoughts about whether I should go take a shower and say fuck it and go without.

At first, I completely forgotten that James was lying next to me; he was so quiet I didn't notice he was there. Plus, he barely moves. Then out of the blue, he snuggled into my shoulder; I yelped pulling away swiftly. _OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! A RAT IN MY BED! A RAT IS IN MY BED! _It groaned when its head hit the mattress then turned to face me.

It was only James.

_Oh thank god, I thought it was another rat that got into the apartment. The last time, I was too scared to set foot on the floor because I was afraid to get bit._

James' eyes fluttered open immediately, looking at me with worried eyes.

"Kendall, are you okay?" rubbing his head.

_I wonder if James would be insulted if I told him I thought he was a rat._

"Yeah, you scared me."

"I did?" he questioned, "-I'm sorry…"

His cheeks flushed red and his voice had a hint of guilt in it.

"It's okay; I just forgot you were there. No problem."

"Oh…"

Blushing even more, he looked away from me. Why is he blushing so much? Did I embarrassed him or is he just uneasy about me being in the same bed with him?

_I notice a long time ago James gotten really shy. Why is that? _

_ "_James…"

_"_Yea?" he refaced me with bright hazel eyes…wow, they're really pretty.

_Oh, here's a fast fact about me; I love to look at eyes. I find them very beautiful and they usually attract me to a girl…like Jo. Her eyes are like pools of warm molten chocolate, sweeter than any other. So sweet. But James…his are mysterious and exquisite with different shades of green and gold. How could I miss such beauty? I've looked into his eyes countless times but not once did they look this appealing._

"Um, Kendall?"

"Uh?"

"Were you going to ask me something?" he pondered.

"Oh…yea, I was." I said stupidly, "…are you uncomfortable about sleeping here last night?"

"No, why?"

"Because you're acting weird."

"How am I acting weird?"

"You're blushing awfully a lot and you've gotten to be really shy lately."

"Am I really blushing?!" he jumped out of bed and ran into our bathroom, a moment later I heard a loud squeal.

"Oh my god!"

"Told you!" I laughed.

"Oh shut up!"

"Come in here and make me!"

"Fine, I will."

He burst from the bathroom and charged right at me. I leaped from the bed and started to run; I laughed when he fell over a pile of my clothes.

"Hey, no fair!"

"Didn't say it had to be fair."

"Why doesn't it?" he pouted.

"Because I said so."

"My knee hurts though…" he rubbed his scrapped knee soothingly; it looked red and unpleasantly sore.

"Sorry about that but you really need to watch out for things."

"You really need to pick up your stuff."

"Why should I?" I asked crossing over to him.

"Because the guy with the Wounded Knee said so…" he snapped, "…and because you wouldn't have fallen for my trap."

James grabbed me by the legs and I tumbled over into the clothes pile. With lighten speed he quickly got up and straddled me while holding my arms above my head; leaving me totally defenseless.

"Will you shut up now?" he grinned.

"Maybe…" I spoke humorously, "…can you get off of me?"

"Will you shut up?"

"James-"

"Fine, then say 'James you're stronger and more handsome then me.'"

"What? I'm not going to say that-"

"Then I'm not moving…"

He was right. It's been seven minutes and he was still holding me down._ God, why does he have to be so stubborn? _The smells of the dirty clothes are starting to get to me, which I think James noticed because he smirked when I made an awful face.

"Fine, I give up; I'll shut up."

"Nope, not going to work."

"But you said-"

"Say 'James you're stronger and more handsome then me.'"

"No! I thought you said that all I had to do is shut up!"

"Changed my mind." He grinned.

"You dick…"

"Do you give up?"

"Yea…" I grumbled in defeat.

"What's the magic word?"

"Jamesyourestrongerandmorehan dsomethenme."

"What? I couldn't hear you, can you repeat that?"

_That bastard's enjoying this!_

_ "_James, you're pissing me off!"

"I know. If I wasn't, it wouldn't be that much fun."

"James!"

"Just say it again and this time, _slower_."

"James you're stronger and more handsome then me." I hissed.

"And don't you forget It." He laughed, releasing me.

"You're so childish, James!"

"So? I get what I want, don't I?"

"Do you want a black eye?!"

_"Nooooo…."_

"Then can it!"

"Such a hateful little boy, aren't you?" He teased, walking over to his dresser and pulling out a shirt and a pair of jeans.

"I'm like that sometimes…hey; don't you need a pair of boxers too?"

He looked very confused before he realized what I said, but then his brain grasped the question.

"Oh…I'm not going to wear any." He turned and headed for the door.

"Why?" he stopped.

"Because I don't feel like it."

"But that's gross."

"Yes, but others with sexually interest might think otherwise…"

"Oh, really?"

"Yes really."

"Okay whatever…" I huffed, "Oh hey James, we should get some breakfast before Carlos eats it all, knowing him, and he's probably already eaten the bacon."

"Awwwww, but I want some…"

"Then forget getting dressed and come on, maybe there's some left."

"Do really think _Carlos_ saved me some?" raising his eyebrow, smiling a doubtful smile.

"Don't know, that's why we need to hurry."

He threw down the clothes and we headed out the door.

(James)

_Oh my god, I was on top of Kendall! I had him in my grasp, he couldn't move! Talk about major boner!_

We headed to the kitchen and sure enough, Carlos was chomping on handfuls of bacon.

"Hey man, save some for us!" Kendall laughed, smacking him on the back.

"Idhghmmmgn…"

"Carlos, don't talk with your mouth full sweetie." Mama Knight informed, "I'll make some more, Kendall."

"Thanks mom!"

"Hey guys, why were you two fighting last night?" Carlos asked when he swallowed his food.

"What?"

_Did they hear us last night? How loud were we? _

_ "_Uh…we did fight but it was nothing important…" Kendall responded.

"Oh really? Then why did James shout you were _hurting_ him?" Carlos probed again.

_Damn Carlos._

_ "_He didn't really hurt me Carlos; we just got into a fight, that's all." I barked, "Nothing too bad."

"Didn't sound like it was all too good either." He pointed out, grabbing another strip of bacon.

"Will you please drop it, you don't want mom hearing us, do you?"

Carlos narrowed his eyes with anger and looked like he was going to hit Kendall but I quickly changed the subject before he got the chance.

"Where's Logan?"

"Still in bed I think, he wasn't awake when I got up." Carlos mumbled, stilling glaring at Kendall with evil eyes.

_So much for that plan._

"Carlos, with you cut it out?!"

"Why? He hurt you, didn't he? Why defend him?" He sounded like my mom.

"Because it's none of your business and he didn't hurt me that bad!" I snapped.

"Will you guys just shut up?" Logan shouted coming out of his bedroom, "I don't want to wake up to you guys fighting!"

"Mornin' hon, the food's on the table." Mama Knight greeted, setting another plate of bacon on the table.

"Mornin' Mama Knight." He sat down next to me and took a hand full of bacon, "Is Katie up yet?"

"I'm afraid not, she has an upset stomach."

"Is it the flu?"

"No, just a virus I think."

"Oh…um hey, does Gustavo need us today?" Carlos asked Logan.

"I don't think-"

"Yeah, he does…remember _'I aspect you dogs to be here, first thing in the morning; nine a.m. sharp_!'" Kendall joked.

"Ah man, what time is it?" Logan asked jumping from his sit.

"It's…" Mama Knight looked at the clock, "8:47..."

"Shit, we're going to be late!" Kendall shouted, flying out of his seat and to our bedroom.

"Language, Kendall!" she shouted.

We hustled to our bedrooms and dressed ourselves before we rushed to Rocque Records, not once did we stop but in the end; we were five minutes late.

"When did I said for you dogs to be here?!" Gustavo shouted as we came into his office.

Boy, he looked mad.

"Nine o'clock sharp." Kendall responded, flopping down into the closest seat.

"And what time is it now?"

"Nine o'…six now…"

"You dogs are late…"

"Only a couple of minutes."

"You were supposed to be here on time!" Gustavo rose from his sit quickly, making me jump.

"Well, we're here now!" Kendall snapped back.

Gustavo was about to say something else but Kelly smacked him in the back of the head, resulting: he gave her an ugly look.

"What Gustavo trying to say is…Griffin is coming and he wants you guys to hear some news he has for you?" Kelly explained.

"That's it?"

"No…Mercedes with him."

_My stomach twisted into a knot._

"Oh god…" we all groaned.

_Oh god is right! There's something not right about that girl! Well, at least she won't date me…but I swear, if she goes anywhere near Kendal again, I'm breaking her neck!_

"Now, when he gets here-"

"I'm already here, Gustavo." Griffin announced, coming into the office with two other men and Mercedes behind him.

"Mr. Griffin!" Gustavo came out from behind his desk, looking all respectful. "Come in, have a seat!"

_Whoa, I got a little light headed for a moment…maybe I need a seat…_

"I'm already _in _Gustavo and I prefer to stand…" Griffin spoke in hurtful tone. "I have some news to tell you…all of you"

"We've heard…" Kendall said dully.

"…I hate to say it but Siggle-Saggles have broken up their band."

"So?" Gustavo crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow.

"So, Wayne-Wayne is in need of another band and-"

"Whoa, whoa, you're not saying that-"

"He's joining this band? Yes."

_Ugh…I feel like I'm to throw up…_

"But Mr. Griffin, you remember what happened last time he join the band!" Carlos protested.

"He tried to kick one of us out!" Logan added, "you can't let him join!'

Griffin stared firmly at all of us, showing no emotions, and turned to one of the men behind him. We waited impatiently for him to finish then he turn back to us.

"I'm sorry but he has a contract that states 'he fit to be in a band', so I have no other choice but to put him in this band."

He turned to leave but stopped.

"Oh and Mercedes…"

"Yes daddy?" she spoke perkily.

"Be a dear and stay here to inform the boys about when Wayne-Wayne will be arriving."

We all groaned again.

"Sure thing daddy." She kissed him on the cheek before he stepped out.

She turned to us with a devilish grin.

"Now…" walking over to Logan slowly. "Last time I checked, you were my boyfriend."

"No- no I wasn't, remember the party? I told you I wasn't dating you…" he stuttered, backing away from the crazed blonde.

"Really? Cuz' I don't remem-"

"Mercedes!" Kendall shouted, getting her attention, "When is Wayne-Wayne getting here?!"

"Oh…about around 1:15 today."

"Great just great…"

I gagged real loudly and everyone looked at me.

"Hey James, are you okay?"

I didn't answer, I began to feel very nauseous and my vision bleared. Whoa, I'm really dizzy.

"James, you don't look so good…"

"Are you sick?"

"Dog, answer the question!"

"I…I feel…dizz-"

Then it happened, my legs gave out and I fell. I felt my head hit the ground and everyone around me dashed to my side.

_James!_

_ Is he alright?!_

_ Of course he's not alright, he fell!_

_ OH MY GOD!_

My body suddenly spasm out of control continuously, I couldn't feel my arms and legs. _What's happening to me?! _My head jerked back and I let out a sharp cry, everyone around me jumped; watching in fear as it continued. W_hy isn't anyone helping me?! Don't just stand there, do something!_ I let out another cry; the muscles in my lung tighten, squeezing the air out of them. Logan got closer and pushed everyone away.

"Back away everyone, he's having a seizure! Move any hard or sharp objects near him that would hurt him! Kelly, watch the clock to time the seizure!" He carefully turned me to my side. "We can't do anything for him right now, so we have to wait it out!"

_Wait it out?! _

"It looks like it hurts…" Carlos whimpered softly.

"He's not in pain Carlos, usually people are asleep when they go through it."

_Like hell! This fucking hurts and I can hear you! HOW THE FUCK CAN I AM ASLEEP?!_

"How long has it been Kelly?"

"Two minutes…"

_I'm gonna die! _

An unbearable pain shot through my chest; I screamed in agony as it spread through my body. It inflamed my skin and strung through my veins, the torment seemed to last forever as it spread.

_Please, just make it stop! Please!_

"I thought you said he wasn't going to be in pain?!" a voice shouted.

"He's not supposed to!" Logan roared, "Someone call 911!"

_911? Am I actually dying?! Please no, I'm too young to die!_

"Kendall, stay with him while I go call Mrs. Knight and tell her what happening!"

"Okay!" He sat down next to me and caressed my hair, saying reassuring words.

"It's okay James, it's alright. Don't worry; it will be over soon…"

_Kendall, help me! It hurts so much!_

"Don't worry, help's on the way, Gustavo just called 911, they're sending ambulance right now…"

_Ambulance? Am I going to a hospital?_

The vicious pain increased my screams and my limbs continued to jerk violently. Unanticipated, Kendall took me into his arms and held me close. Tears were forming from his eyes and I could tell he was about to cry.

"Please calm down, its o-okay, J-James, Shhh…"

_Oh Kendall…_

I threw my head back and let another cry; Kendall held me closer to body and whispered calming words to me. His body felt so warm against my skin, so relaxing…wait, should he be holding me….?

Little by little, I began to black out, the pain went numb and I couldn't feel a thing. My body movements ceased.

"Kendall…"

"I'm here James, don't worry…"

"I…"

"Yea…?"

"I lov…"

I lost consciousness and fell into his arms. With my eyes closed, I went into a deep sleep; my last sentence unfinished.

_I sat comfortable on checkered picnic blanket, waiting for Kendall to sit down next to me with the basket. _

_ "I'm made your favorite." He said cheery, setting the basket down and opening the lid, "Apple pie with whip cream…"_

_ "Delicious, thank you very much."_

_ "You're welcome; Jamie…and I really did make it, see?"_

_The pie looked fresh from the oven and it smelled yummy._

_ "I didn't buy it, I like I did for Jo." He grinned, "You're too special to eat a store-bought pie."_

_ "What about Jo?"_

_ "What about her?"_

_ "Is she not special to you?"_

_ "No, she a shank."_

_I thought so._

_ "She a skank, huh?"_

_ "Yea, I seen her make out with other guys when I'm not in the room, I'm not that stupid…"_

_ "So…do you love me?"_

_ "Yes, I love you…"_

_ "How much?"_

_ "A lot…"_

_ "How much is a lot?"_

_ "You know what I mean, James."_

_ "No Kendall, I don't…" I teased, "…can you clarify?"_

_ "Clarify?" raising an eyebrow._

_ "What do you love about me?"_

_ "You so beautiful, I love you're smile. You're always kind to me and you never try to hurt me. I love your confidence, which you've haven't been showing lately, and you have the most beautiful eyes-"_

_ "You have beautiful eyes too."_

_ "But there nothing compared to yours…" he cooed, "…I love you so much."_

_ "Prove it…" _

_I pulled him into a passionate kiss and he moaned in pleasure. I licked his lower lips for access but he refused. I growled husky, pulling him down with me as I relax back on the blanket. He parted my legs and lay between them, leaving my lips and pressing butterfly kisses down jaw line to my neck. He nipped at my sensitive skin sending erotic jolts of pleasure to my groin. I moaned loud and Kendall smirked into the kiss. _

_ "Do you like that, baby?" _

_ "Y-yes…"_

_I wrapped my arms around his shoulders tightly and moaned again._

_ "More…"_

_Kendall nipped at my neck again then bit as hard as he could._

_ "Kendall!" I cried, tightening my hold._

_ "It's alright, babe."_

_He sucked at the wound and every now and then licked it soothing with his tongue, afterwards a hickey formed on my neck._

_ "Do you want me to continue?" he asked with a sexy tone._

_ "Yes…oh god, yes!"_

_Reaching for the hem of my shirt, he tugged it up and over me. Setting it aside and gazing at my tanned body._

_ "James…you're so beautiful." His eyes devoured every inch of my body, licking his lips when they landed on my happy trail. "May I?"_

_ "Yes…"_

_He went to lean down but stop and sat up._

_ "I got a better idea…"_

_He reached into the basket and pulled out the whip cream, shaking the can teasing before squirting a line of whip cream from my chest to my belly button._

_ "I like this idea!" I grinned._

_He tossed the can beside us and leaned toward my chest. He swirled his tongue, lapping up the whip cream then nipping at my skin softly. The lower he got, the more I got aroused. When he got to my belly button, he dipped his tongue and bit the edge of my navel._

_ "Oh…"_

_He smiled, releasing the skin between his teeth and continued down to my jeans. Kendall looked up to me with his innocent eyes; I nodded with approval; which made him smile._

_With his teeth, Kendall grasped the jean fabric and yanked them loose; they came off with ease, showing my noticeable bulge beneath my boxers._

_ "Are you that aroused?"_

_ "Kendall…please…"_

_He smiled, _

_ "Take them off…"_

_My shaking hands took a hold of the fabric and slowly pulled them down, exposing my erotic length._

_ "Perfect." Purred Kendall._

_ "Kendall hurry…"_

_ "Patience love, if you keep this up, I'll go slower."_

_ "Kendall…" I whined._

_He rolled his eyes and smiled devilishly,_

_ "Turn over."_

_He pulled away from me and I got on my knees and leaned forward. I looked behind me seeing Kendall grabbing something from the basket._

_ "Don't want you to get hurt so I came prepared."_

_Lubricant. _

_ "Did you plan on doing this?"_

_ "Yes…well, not in the park." He lubricated fingers as he spoke._

_We're still in the park?_

_Oh yeah, I'm a twisted pervert…_

_ "Are you ready?" _

_I nodded my head and he lightly pushed one of his fingers into me. I admit, it hurt like hell. I winced at the pain and my breathing hitched. Tears began to stream down face. Kendall rubbed my back and told me to relax. The pain faded away then I motioned him to add another. The pain came back but not as bad as before, he pulled out then back in several times; scissor and curled his fingers to stretch me. _

_ "Okay, I'm going to add the last one hon…"_

_He pulled the two out then back in with the third. It didn't hurt at all, it was pure bliss. I moaned and pushed back onto him. He gripped my side with his other hand and groaned quietly. _

_ "Kendall, I'm ready."_

_ "Are you sure? We could wait a little longer." He said anxiously._

_ "No, I'm ready Kendall…please…"_

_ "Alright."_

_He pulled his fingers out and kissed between my shoulder blades before lining his member behind me. I felt the tip brushed against my puckering hole, the sudden touch cause my breath to hitch and I flinched. _

_ "This is going to hurt a bit…"_

_With one swift thrust, his dick went all the way in; I screamed in pain. He rubbed my back some more, making hushing noises and waiting for me to relax. The stringing went down after a while, even though it still hurt a bit, I told him I was ready._

_He pulled back a little then pushed back in; the pace was slow and sloppy at first but picked up and went steady and faster. I could hear him grunt and pant from behind me, moans echoed out when I clenched him._

_ "Oh, you're so tight" He whined, "so warm…"_

_ "Kendall…harder…"_

_The heat built in groin as I felt my orgasm rising, I whimpered when Kendall suddenly grabbed my own length, pumping it along the same pace._

_ "Kendall…I'm gonna cum…"_

CH5

"James?"

"Huh?" I thought to myself, "Kendall?"

_What happened? Where's Kendall? Where am I? Why is it so dark?_

"I think I saw him move a little."

"Carlos, will you stop it?! You're going to end up hurting him!"

"What? Poking his face won't hurt him."

_Why are you poking my face? _

"Carlos, cut it out!"

_Kendall! I thought you were gone, why can't see you? Did I go blind?_

"Hmmm."

"Wait, I think he's trying to say something."

"Kendall…"

"I'm here James."

"Were am I?" I asked with a weak voice.

"You're in the hospital."

"Yeah, you gave us quite a scared there."

_Gustavo's here? Who else is in the room?_

"I can't see."

_Open your eyes._

_Kiley?!_

_Open your eyes James._

My eyes fluttered open and the light from the window blinded me.

_Oh God, bright light, bright light!_

I squinted them close and moaned loudly.

"Damn it!"

"Are you okay, James?"

"Yeah, the light blinded me." I groaned, rubbing my eyes.

"Close the window blinds, the light could trigger another seizure." Logan instructed.

Carlos jumped from his sit and went to the window to shut the blinds.

_Yeah it was Carlos; he really needs to learn how to pick up his feet when he walks._

"You can open your eyes now!" Carlos yelled.

"Thanks."

Reopening my eyes, my sight adjusted enough to let me see; I couldn't believe who was there.

Of course, Kendall, Logan, and Carlos were there. They're my best buds. Gustavo (big shocker) and Kelly was here and so was Mrs. Knight, Camille, Guitar dude, Tyler and…Jo.

_Stupid skank._

_ "_Everyone's here." I said blankly. "Where's Katie?"

"At home dear heart, she still has the virus." Ms. Knight kindly.

"And of course everyone's here, we're worried about you." Camille said patting my foot. "Why wouldn't we?"

"I don't know."

"Why don't you know?"

"I don't know."

I could tell she was worried of course; she was calm and not semi-crazed. Her facial features actually looked miserable…and I don't like that.

"Camille, I'm fine. Don't be sad please, I don't like it when you're sad-"

"Are you sure you're fine?" Jo interrupted.

"_Yes_, I'm fine…" I said, giving an unnoticed tone to my voice. "And as I was saying…Camille, I'm fine. Be happy."

I gave a look at Kendall and he smiled empathically.

"Also I thought there was a limit on how many people could come into room."

"There's not." Jo said harshly.

Again, I gave Kendall a look and he motioned to Jo to cool it. She huffed in defeat and sat down in a chair close to the back of the room, not bothering to apologize for being a snot to me.

"There is a limit but Gustavo paid them to let that rule slide." Kendall explained.

"Oh…Damn! My head hurts!" My hand shot up and grasped my skull; it throbbed terribly with a sudden pain.

"Probably because your head hit the ground hard when you fell."

We all went silent.

_Or from your girlfriend being a stuck-up bitch!_

I looked over towards Jo in hatred; she was sitting in the cushioned chair with her legs pressed to her chest, staring back at me. Her eyes narrowed as in animosity and her lips twitched oddly into a smirk.

_What is she thinking? _

I quickly looked away and started up the conversation again.

"Agh…can I get anything to fix it? Morphine perhaps?"

"For a headache?" Logan questioned, "No, its use only is for severe pain and we don't need you going all loopy on us."

_Damn Logan._

"But it hurts really badly!"

"I could ask if they have anything else…"

"It's a hospital Carlos, of course they going to have something!" Gustavo roared.

"Excuse me; is this Mr. Diamond's room?"

We all turned to look at the door, a woman in a white coat stood there with a chart in her hand.

"Um yes, I'm James Diamond."

"You have a lot of friends, Mr. Diamond."

_Not all of them are my friends._

"Yes, I do."

"Is it okay if I ask them to step out for the moment?"

"Huh…yes of course…"

"What?" Carlos looked at the doctor with wary eyes, "I don't want to go, can't I stay?"

"Only three people can stay for the moment, I need to do some tests and I don't need the room crowd with people while I do them."

"Kendall, Carlos and Logan can stay, they're his best friends." Mrs. Knight said, getting up to leave.

"Aren't you his mother?"

"No, I'm just his guardian…sorta. I'm just looking after him." Mama Knight smiled, turning to me. "And honey, you get to feeling better, okay?"

"Will do." I beamed.

As everyone began to depart, Kendall rose hastily from his seat and dashed over to Jo before she walked out. He grabbed her and pulled aside; speaking softly to her about something. I couldn't see what he was saying since there was a distance between them and me but from Jo's expression, I guess it wasn't good. She looked crossed, I mean really crossed. Her eyes were filled with rage, cheeks flushed red and whispered rapidly and irritated. Kendall argued back for minute but then gave up and tried to calm her down. _Stupid Snob. _He pulled her into a hug, patting her hair and apologizing for something. She relaxed. They said their good byes before she gave him a quick kiss. Sending me a nasty look when she left.

Whore.

"What was that all about?"

I looked up and the nurse stood there, staring at the couple's previous bickering.

"Huh…I don't know, guess she's pissed about something. She did come in here all moody."

"Is she mad at you?"

"Don't know, I didn't do anything to her…"

"Is that her boyfriend?"

"Yea…" I said gloomily.

"Oh, you don't like it?"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to, sweetie. It's written all over your face."

I looked at her with daggered eyes.

"Oh really? How about yo-" I froze.

Oh my god…

It was Kiley!

It was really her, the same red wavy hair, emerald eyes and her sweet, beautiful voice. She smiled a warm smile then turned to look at some hospital machine that's name I don't know. _Why is she dressed like a nurse? _I watched her curiously while she wrote things down then turned back to me. She pressed the scope thingy to my chest and counted the beats that throbbed the past minute.

"Kiley…?"

"So you do remember me?" She grinned.

"Yea…where'd go?"

"Nowhere, hon. I was with you the whole time."

"What?"

"I with you the whole time, you just didn't see me…even when you were kissing the blonde boy when he was asleep…" she said, wiggling her eyebrows.

My eyes widened and I went red from embarrassment.

"You were watching?!"

"Yea and I got to say, he's a really cutie!"

"Shhh!" I hushed, looking and Kendall and the others. They were all distracted by a new app, Logan got on his Iphone. Something about trying to kill yourself in less than five minutes… (Yea, that's the kind of games we want children to play…) …I played it before but it was on a computer instead of a phone. It actually harder than it looks, especially when you're a beginner who doesn't know the fuck you're doing.

"What?"

"I don't want him to know!" I hissed.

"Why not?"

"Because he has a girlfriend! I'm a guy and he's not interested in guys."

"Okay, okay! I won't say anything…jeez." She said, raising her hands in defense.

"Why are you here…how are you here?"

"I'm magical, remember?"

"Yes."

"Do you remember anything else?"

"Like what?"

"Like what happened yesterday."

_ "I said, LEAVE HER ALONE!" _

_ "You little fucker, I told you to go away, this is not your fight!" _

_ "I not going to let you hurt her!" _

"Yea I remember, actually trying to forget…"

"Understandable…but I need you to remember…what I said…what I fought for…who I fought- do you remember him"

"Mr. Walker…" I answered coldly.

"Yes…"

"What did he do?"

"What do you mean?" She questioned with eyebrow raised.

"I mean, why did he try to hurt you back at the alley."

Her eyes hardened, as so did her face. Her pleasant smile was gone and was replaced by a cold one. It kind of scared me…

"Kiley?"

"Do you really want to know, James?" her sweet voice gone and replaced with a serious one.

"Yes…" I whisper in a soft squeak.

"Around 1856, he was imprisoned for a murder-spree. He was a clever man, always got away and never left any evidence at the death scene. When we found out who was doing it, he's already killed sixty-three people." She paused for a moment then continued, "They called him 'The Bloody Phantom', since he would slaughter his victims cruelly and in an inhumane way. Funny name, huh? Silly humans and their nicknames….when we finally caught him, he killed a total of a hundred and forty-nine people. He was sentenced to life in prison but somehow…he escaped and killed the Elemental Sorcerer…which is where he gained the elements to use for revenge. "

"Element Sorcerer? What's that?"

"A Elemental Sorcerer is a being that can master all four of the elements, you know, like Fire, Water, Earth and Air."

"I thought that was the Avatar?"

"Same thing like that but an Avatar is born with the elements and can reborn…an Elemental Sorcerer can't not." She explained, taking her chart and writing things down.

"Why can't they?" I glanced at the guys quickly then turned back at Kiley.

"Because the Element Sorcerer isn't born with the elements, they must earn the opportunity to weld them."

_"…why would I, when you'll be the keeper of the elements?"_

"…you said I was the keeper of the elements…" I said quietly, "…I'm not the Elemental Sorcerer…am I?"

"You're one of them…" She smiled.

"One of them?" I looked at her confused, "What do you mean I'm one of them?"

"Somehow you only got one element…the others are still roaming around for a host."

"I got an element? Which one?" I sat with interest.

"I don't know, you have to use it before can we know."

"How do I use it?"

"Try to concentrate, think about each of the elements…"

"So if I think of water, a whole glop of it will pop out of my hands?" I said too loudly.

Oh no…I can't hear the others talking.

The room suddenly grew quiet. The guys' attention were now on Kiley; not moving or speaking. Carlos' eyes were bugged-eyed and his mouth gaped.

Shit.

It was around 12:43 when the doctors decided to release me; since they couldn't find anything wrong, they didn't really had a reason to keep me there. As I was signing the papers to be released, Carlos was asking question a-mile-a minute about Kiley.

Ever since they over hear our conversation, Carlos started pestering about her. Kiley even had to leave the room because it got too uncomfortable for her.

I begged her to stay but she said she had somewhere else to be.

Liar.

"What was she saying about you have a power? Is it a superhero power, oh! Are you going to be a superhero-?"

Mile. A. Minute.

"Carlos, will you cut it out?!" I warned as I gave the woman at the front desk the papers. She gave me an odd look before taking them.

But of course, he didn't seem to hear me and kept rambling as usually.

"Are you going to go through some changes…Oh, like Spiderman? Are you going to start swinging from webs and-"

"Carlos, will you please stop?! Will talk about it when we get home but not right now."

I looked over to the other guys for some help but they seemed to be preoccupied in their own little world. Logan was chatting away with his cell phone, probably talking to Camille and Kendall…he was deep into his thoughts. Elbows on his knees and chin placed in his hands, he was staring off into space.

He looks so cute.

_He does, doesn't he?_

_Kiley, will you please stop doing that?!_

_What? I just agreeing will you, what's wrong with that?_

_These are my own personal thoughts!_

_So?_

_Get out!_

_Fine._

God, she's annoying…

_I heard that._

_Get out of my head!_

"James?"

"Uh?"

Carlo was standing in front of me with worried eyes. He looked at me suspiciously, as if he was waiting for me to go into another seizure.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" I spoke as if nothing happened.

I'm fine, really I am.

"Are you sure?" I could literally hear the anxiety in his voice.

"Yes Carlos, I'm fine. I don't feel dizzy, I don't feel the need to fall down and start spasming." I laughed, patting him on the shoulder.

"James, that's not funny." He whispered.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry…" I apologized, "But you I didn't really have a seizure, I was getting an _element_…"

"Do you know which one?" he asked excitedly.

"No, you ran Kiley out before we got the chance to figure it out." I pointed out.

"Sorry, just got a little excited…" he said, giving me his puppy pout.

I laughed.

"Carlos, it's okay, she told me she'll come back later. Don't worry 'bout it."

His face lit up with a smile.

"Okay!" he jumped up and down in the air then stopped, "hey are you finished up here?"

"Yeah, let's go." I said, heading toward the other guys, "You ready to go? Mama Knight probably waiting for us out in the car."

Logan hung up his phone and nodded; Kendall just got up and went for the door.

What's with him?

_Maybe he's sick._

_Kiley! GET. OUT. OF. MY. HEAD._

(Ms. Knight)

"The doctor said he's fine?"

I started tapping my fingers nervously on the steering wheel as I waited outside the hospital. How can he fine?

_"Yea, said that they when they tested him, that his brain functioning fine and it didn't show any episodes of irregular electrical discharge when they flash a light in his eyes; there's no sign of epi__lepsy."_

"But if he doesn't have epilepsy, then why did he suddenly have a seizure in Gustavo's office?"

_"Stress?"_

"Stress? Stress are can cause a seizure?" I said doubting it.

_"Maybe…stress could probability do it." _

"But from what, Logan?!" I snapped.

I heard his breathe suddenly hitched on the other side of the phone.

"Logan honey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap, it's just…I afraid, that's all."

He sighed in relief.

_"I know, he's fine now though."_

"How can you be sure? What if it happens again?"

_"I doubt it will Mama Knight, but if it does, we'll know how to handle it."_

"Are you positive?"

_"Yes."_

"Okay, hey when are you boys ready to go? Katie's at home and I need to fix supper."

_"James is signing the release papers now."_

"Good, I'll meet you in a bit." I hung up and stared at the hospital entrance, waiting.

Instead of seeing four boys walking out like I was hoping for, I spotted Kendall running out in tears. I felt a piece of my heart break as he opened the van's side door and rushed toward to the back; quickly wiped his them so I wouldn't notice.

"What's wrong sweet heart?" I asked sympathetically.

"Nothing's wrong."

"Then why are you crying sweet heart?"

"I'm not."

"Don't lie to me, Kendall"

"I'm not lying."

"Kendall-"

"Can we talk about later? Please?" His eyes were looking in the direction of the Hospital Entrance; I looked too, seeing Logan, Carlos and James heading towards us.

"Alright." I smiled.

When all the boys were in and seated, I started the van and drove out of the parking lot.

James sat next to me in the passenger seat, looking out the window while Carlos and Logan sat in the seat behind us, talking about some weird show. Elements, powers and a girl named Kiley.

"Hey guys, what kind of show are you talking about, I've never heard about it before. Is it new?" I asked, looking in the rearview mirror.

"Oh it's not a show, it's-"

Logan elbowed Carlos in the side, causing him to gasp in pain.

"Logan! Why on earth did you do that to him?!" I shrieked, pulling the van over to the curb and looking back at him.

"Sorry, it's a game we're playing." He responded quickly then looking at Carlos, "Sorry man didn't mean to hit you that hard."

"You're not still playing Dungeons and Dragons are you?"

"No mam, they're playing a new game, aren't you Logan?" James answered.

"Y-yeah, it's called Rifts. It's like Dungeons and Dragons but you don't act out the parts." He explained, "Right Carlos?"

"Sure…" Carlos said, still rubbing his side.

"Yeah, that's it…"

I looked at past Logan and Carlos towards Kendall who was looking out the window, watching cars go by.

"Kendall, is there something you want to say?"

"No…"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes…"

I glanced at all the boys before turning around and starting the car again. It was silence the whole way back.

(James)

Mama Knight was kind enough to drop us off a Rocque Records before heading home but since we're going up to meet an our "new band member", I wished she'd would just take us with her. On the way up, we could hear Wayne-Wayne mouthing Gustavo about one of our songs. Kendall mimicked Wayne-Wayne, making a goofy face to go along with it. We laughed quietly before Logan shushed us so we head in.

"Well, well, if it isn't my old pals!" Wayne-Wayne exclaimed, looking at us with a somewhat "friendly" grin.

"Well, well, if it isn't the guy who tried to run one of us out of _our_ band." Kendall said in a cheery sarcastic voice.

Wayne-Wayne grin faded and his face went gravestone.

"Kendall…" He said firmly.

"Wally…" He shot back.

That seemed to strike a nerve.

"Don't call me that, my name is Wayne-Wayne! WAYNE-WAYNE!" He shouted, getting directly in Kendall's face while he does.

"Wayne-Wayne, Wally, does it matter? You're still the same loser that you were before."

"Kendall…" Kelly warned.

"Whatever, Gustavo what do you want us to do with newbie here?" Kendall said eyeing Wayne-Wayne.

We all looked at Gustavo; he was sitting back in his sit enjoying our little drama.

"Well Kendall, it seem that Griffin wants Wayne-Wayne to sing with you in the upcoming event, prom was it Kelly?" He turned to Kelly and she shook her head. "Anyway, he wants Wayne-Wayne to sing with you. No ifs, ands, or buts."

_"H__m, butts…" _Carlos side-commented.

"No Carlos, no butts…" Gustavo said before, turning to me, "Well?"

"Well what?" I said clueless.

"Are you…you know…_okay_?" He asked, trying to sound like he didn't even care.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine. It was a one-time thing." I said reassuring.

"Hey hello, song remember?" Wayne-Wayne interrupted, waving his hand in my face, "We can worry about you're pity-party later."

"I wasn't having a pity-party! He just ask if I was okay!" I snapped, smacking his hand out of my face.

"I don't care." He said wickedly then heading off to the sound booth. "When you guys are done being girls, I'll be in here."

We all looked at Gustavo with the exact thing on our minds.

We. Want. Him. Out.

"Gustavo-" Logan started before Gustavo stopped him.

"I know, he's horrible but we're stuck with him until I convince Griffin to put him somewhere else until till then, we have to deal with it.

So far, dealing with it isn't doing too well for us. He told Mr. X that his dance technique was lame and it should be done a certain way, making it more about him and having our dancing cut short. Every time we start recording, he would stop in mid-song and tell Gustavo a certain thing has to change. What once was a well-written song is now well, shit. Wayne-Wayne made it so that every time it would be _mine _turn to sing it would be his and that I would be just back-up.

_Me, James Diamond, a background singer! What the HELL?!_

_I agree, this boy is just unpleasant._

_Kiley, I'm not in the mood._

_I'm sorry dear heart._

When we finished the track, Gustavo told us to sit tight while he went to go get another cup of coffee but really, I think he wanted to leave before he strangled him. Right after he left, Wayne-Wayne started up again.

"So Carlos, you like to sing?" he asked as politely as he could.

"Yeah!" Carlos said radiantly, bouncing on the couch.

"So tell me, when are you going to start actually singing?"

Carlos stopped bouncing and his childish vanished, "What do you mean?"

"You fucking suck." Wayne-Wayne grinned.

"No he doesn't, he sounds better than you!" I said, gritting my teeth.

He got up from where he was sitting and got in my face.

"Is that so Princess?"

"Princess?" What the fuck?

"Are you taking up for your _boyfriend_?" He sneered.

"We're not dating." Carlos babbled.

"Oh sure, sure whatever floats your boat." He said with a evil grin.

Before I could say anything else, Gustavo came back with his cup of coffee.

"DOGS, BACK IN THE SOUNDBOOTH NOW!" He roared.

We all went back in the sound booth obediently.

"Okay since Wayne-Wayne is now part of this band, I needed to change up _Halfway There _abit. James I know you singing lead in this song but Griffin informed me that Wayne-Wayne has to sing lead in at least one song-"

"No."

"James, he has-"

"No, _Halfway There _is my favorite song to sing, you can't-" I pleaded, but of course Gustavo ignored me.

"_Halfway There, _track five…" He pressed the record button and music filled our headphones but instead of me singing to my part, it was Wayne-Wayne."

I was burning with anger as the song was being recorded. I shot a look over to Wayne-Wayne; he on the other hand was grinning back at me.

That bastard!

With one last smirk, he turned back toward the lyrics.

_We're halfway there_

_And lookin' good now_

_And nothing's gonna get in the way_

_We're halfway there_

_And lookin' back now_

_I never thought that I'd ever say_

_We're halfway there…We're halfway there_

Fuck this!

I pulled off my headphone and threw them forcefully to the ground, making aloud _crack_; the guys jumped in shock as I stormed out of the booth.

"James, where the hell do you think you're going?! We're recording!"

_Not with me! _

_James, don't be like this-_

_Shut up Kiley!_

I ran out of the room and into the closest door I came too.

The restroom.

No one else was in the restroom so I didn't bother to keep quiet. I slammed the door closed and smashed my fists into it.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" I shouted on the top of my lungs.

I hate Wayne-Wayne! I hate him! Why is he fucking with me!? Kendall's the one who pissed him off, who got him kick out of Big Time Rush, NOT ME!

I growled in anger.

_Ow, my hands hurt._

Looking down, I noticed my knuckles were scraped and bleeding from hitting the door too hard.

"Damn…"

I need to be gentler next time.

Walking over to the sink, I took a quick glance at myself in the mirror before washing my hands.

_Shit, my hair's mess up._

Forgetting my wounds, I got out my lucky comb to brush down my hair but before I brought to my head, it started to melt in my hands.

I yelped in fear as I tossed it down to the counter. It continued to melt and boil, simmering as it was an egg on a fry pan.

"My comb!" I scowled, "Damn it!"

With all my rage built up, I pummeled my blooded fist into the mirror, sending sparks of flames everywhere.

I jumped back in shock and fell onto the ground hard. The flames shot everywhere before going out.

"Oh shit…"

"James, what did you do?!"

I froze. It was Carlos.

I turned to him and he was staring at the mirror in horror. He looked to me, opened his mouth like he was going to say something but then closed it.

"Carlos, I- I don't know what to say. I-" I started to ramble abit.

He kept staring.

"Carlos?"

"You're-" He stopped and his face lit up. "You're element! It's fire!"

He jumped up and down excited and clapped his hands like a five year old. I smiled as his childish behavior before standing up.

Wow, fire…

CH6

After a long, _**long **_day of harmonies and dance rehearsals to Wayne-Wayne's liking, we finally went home. Mama Knight and Katie wasn't there but supper already made and waiting for so we went ahead and ate. The entire time we were eating, Kendall was facing the table and playing with his food. I've tried to start a conversation with him but he kept staring down at the table.

"Kendall?"

"…"

I tried again.

"Kendall, what's wrong?"

Carlos seemed to notice too because he began to ask questions too.

"Yeah man, what's with you?" Carlos probed, as he took a swing of his Dr. Pepper, "did Wayne-Wayne pissed you off?"

He finally looked up.

"Huh?"

"Are you feeling alright?" Logan repeated.

"Oh, yeah…just daydreaming."

_You know he's lying right?_

"What?" I stupidly said out loud, causing everyone to look at me.

"What?" Carlos repeated.

"Huh? Uh…" God, I feel so stupid.

"Is there something wrong James." Logan asked anxiously, getting up from his seat rushing to me. "Do you feel like going into another seizure?!"

"No. I mean…Kendall you don't look like you've been daydreaming." I said rather stupidly.

They looked at me with curious eyes and I blushed with embarrassment.

"What do you mean I don't look like I'm daydreaming? What do I look to you? And why where you even staring?" His voice was a bit bleak, which made me blush even more.

I didn't answer a first simply because I didn't have an answer that didn't show any of my feelings for him. Why was I staring?

"I-uh, I just thought…uh, you were upset- that's all…" I babbled, looking down at my plate; suddenly not feeling hungry anymore. "I'm sorry…"

His face softened and he gave a rather cute grin towards me.

I swear I felt my heart skipped a beat.

"It's alright, it's not your fault." He said, taking a bite out of his cheeseburger.

Then out of nowhere Carlos started jumping up and down in his chair.

"Oh, oh! Guess what! We found out what James' element is!" Carlos exhilarated.

"What, when?" Logan asked, still standing by me. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"I- we (Carlos gave a look for almost not including him) didn't want Wayne-Wayne to overhear us and I guess I sorta forgot." I muttered.

"Well?" Kendall sat down his cheeseburger and looked at me.

"Well what?" I asked looking at him.

"Which element?"

"Oh, uh- Fire."

"Fire! That's wonderful!" Logan cheered, running to his laptop in the living room, "How did you find out?"

"I torched my lucky comb."

Logan frown and Kendall, who was suddenly behind me, patted my back sympathetically.

"Sorry man."

"Yeah, guess you have to buy another one."

I grumbled in disapproval. _Why did it have to be my lucky comb? Why!? _

"Hey Logan, What'cha doing?" Kendall asked, leaving his place behind me and joining Logan on the couch. Carlos also got up and went over to where Logan was. I was left alone at the kitchen.

"I looking up facts and info about the element fire." He said coolly. "Ah, here it is…"

His eyes scanned the screen before repeating what it said.

"Fire represents passion, enthusiasm, desire and courage, force, lust, fertility and virility, initiative and rejuvenation."

"What's rejuvenation?" Carlos asked, looking at Logan in confusion.

"To make somebody become, feel, or appear young again." Logan said, still reading the page.

"Oh…what about in-imitative, what's that?"

"_Initiative_ is the ability to act and make decisions without the help or advice of other people." Logan answered.

"Does it say anything else?" I asked, half thrilled, half nervous. I was still sitting in the kitchen so I couldn't peek over Logan's shoulder to get a look.

"Um yeah- A low fire person is usually cold, slow to act, without enthusiasm for life or himself.-" Logan read before getting cut off by Kendall bursting in laughter.

"James- not into- himself?!" Kendall said between laughs, "impossible!"

"You didn't let me finish, Kendall."

He stop laughing and just shrug it off. He smiled and got up from the couch. He walked towards me and sat down beside me.

"Sorry but please, this is James we're talking about. _The Face_, remember?" He grinned, throwing his arm around my shoulder and giving a gentle squeeze. I gave him a shy smile and then looked down at the floor. God, I hope I wasn't blushing too hard. "Anyway, you were saying?

Logan turned back to his computer.

"A low fire person is usually cold, slow to act, without enthusiasm for life or himself, however, a high fire person is bold, dramatic and passionate in all areas within himself."

"Now that sounds like our James…" Kendall smirked then ruffling my hair.

"Hey! Watch the hair!" I snared, smacking his hand away and patting my now messy hair, "Great, now it ruined! And I don't have my lucky comb!"

I slump into the chair dramatically and gave a loud huff. Kendall just laughed.

"Oh James, will stop being just a little drama queen? I'll let you borrow mine, okay?" Kendall smiled, giving me a hug, "Just until you can get a new one."

Kendall's hugging me!

"God, I swear you're bipolar." I muttered.

"Why's that?" he asked, still hugging me.

"Because just a while ago, you were all moody and now you're acting like you're cocaine."

"Oh…"

"What's cocaine?" Carlos asked.

"Nothing you need to know about…anyway, may I continue please?" Logan asked, looking like he was trying to control his temper.

Guess he doesn't like to be interrupted.

"Sure…" I said, hoping to god that no one would see I blushing badly.

"Okay, it says here that Fire has been an important part of all cultures and religions from pre-history to modern day and was vital to the development of civilization. It has been regarded in many differ-"

Rrrrrriiinnngg

Logan's phone went off.

"Um Logan, you're phone is rin-"

"I know, I know!" He whispered, looking at the caller ID, "shush, it's Camille!"

He flipped his phone open and stuck it to his ear.

"Camille. Hi, Logan here!"

"She knows that." Carlos pointed out.

"Shh!" Logan hushed, "sorry about that Camille, you were saying?"

"Probably calling to ask you out, Logie-bear." Kendall said, removing his hands from my waist and resting one arm around my neck.

_Okay, my face is feeling really hot now. _

"Okay. Okay, I'll pick up now if you want…okay, bye."

Logan closed his phone and jumped up from the couch, we all watched him walk to his room then back out with his car keys and a jacket.

"Where are you going Logie-bear, I thought you were going to read to us…" Carlos got up and pointed at Logan's laptop.

"Sorry guys, Camille wants to spend time with me before she leaves for New York. She's going to be there for about three months. And stop calling me that!" Logan explained.

"Why's she going to New York?" Carlos asked.

"Filming for a movie."

"What movie?"

"Don't know something about a spy or something."

He left and we sat on the couch in silence.

"So…who wants to read?" I asked, breaking the silence.

"Not me, I'm going to bed." Carlos said, heading off to his and Logan's bedroom.

"But it's barely dark out, why do you want to go to bed this early?" I blurted out.

"Because with Logan gone, I can snoop through his candy drawer." He grinned, then scurrying to their room.

"Logan has a candy drawer?"

"Why hasn't Carlos told us about this?" Kendall got up and ran after Carlos, "be right back, I'm going see if I can sneak us some Snicker bars!"

I could hear Kendall and Carlos talk back and forth back Logan's candy drawer. Apparently, there's a certain way to get in it and that it wouldn't open any other way. A minute later, Kendall waltzed back in with a Snickers and a Milky Way.

"Sorry, there was only one Snickers." He tossed me the Milky Way and tore open the Snickers.

"Why do I Milky Way? Why can't you?" I asked.

"Can't, remember? It makes me sick." He said, taking a bite of his candy bar.

"I don't remember that."

"Sure you do, remember when we went trick-or-tricky when we were kids? I've got sick when I ate one."

"Yeah, but maybe it was from you eating all that candy!" I laughed, picking up the milky way, "but whatever you say!"

He smiled at me and we finished off the rest of the sweets we- well, he stole from Logan's secret stash. We sat there for about minute before any of us said anything.

"Um, you want to finish reading about fire?" Kendall asked me.

"Na, its sounds too much like school work; maybe later."

"Okay, sooo, what do you want to do?" he asked in a sort of bored tone.

"Don't know."

"What 'ya try it?"

"Try what?!" I said stupidly.

"Y'know, you're fire power."

I went to answer him but before I could, Kendall's phone went off. I looked at him curiously as he looked at the Caller ID.

"It's Jo."

I groaned.

"What?" he asked.

"Oh nothing." I lied, jumping up from my sit, "I'll be in our room."

Walking out into our room and out of sight, I leaned against the door to listen into his conversation with Jo.

_You know it's wrong to ease drop, right? _

_AND WHAT YOU'RE DOING ISN'T EASE DROPING?!_

_No, it's called guiding._

_I don't need you're guiding._

_You wield one of the elements, I must._

_No you don't._

_Yes, I do._

_Shh, will shut it! I'm trying to listen._

"Hi Jo, how are you…I'm fine."

He sounded peeved and I could hear him pacing.

"Jo, I said no; I'm not ready for that yet, I've already told you a hundred times."

Ready for what?

"Jo please, we're in no rush, we can wait…."

I gasped.

That whore! She wants to have sex with him!

"…why do you want to now, anyway? I thought we both agree to wait until we're married?"

Ugh, _married._

"What does this have to do with James?"

I froze.

Oh god…

I leaned closer, opening the door abit to peek out.

Kendall has stopped pacing and was standing in the middle of the living room.

"Wha- oh, how do you know that? You're probably just over-reacting…"

What she telling him- oh no, she knows!

_James honey, calm down it's alright-_

_No it's not, Kendall knows I like him and now he probably hates me!_

_Deny it_

_No, if I do then I'll never be able to tell him_

_Then tell him now_

_But I'm not ready to tell him!_

_Why not? _

_I'm scared_

_You're making this more difficult than it needs to be!_

_Kiley, please help me!_

_How?_

"Fine, I'll go and ask him, if it makes you feel better; I'll call you back."

Panicking, I leapt into my bed and covered up.

I heard the door open softly.

"Hey James?"

I kept quiet, so scared that I couldn't even speak.

"James?"

Still quiet.

"Must' have fallen asleep."

He stumbled over to his side of the room and collapsed onto his bed.

"Guess I'll turn in too, almost 8."

We laid there for what seemed like hours, Logan soon came home and went to bed, and then after him so did Mama Knight and Katie after they came back from, I guess, shopping.

The apartment grew quiet, the clock from the kitchen clicked with every second and the grasshoppers outside chirped. Hours passed but I laid awake, thinking.

Jo now knows like I liked Kendall and now wants to have sex with him. Bitch, she only doing that to piss me off.

I gritted my teeth.

_Kiley when can I see you? I need someone to talk to. _

Nothing. Kiley voice didn't come.

"I feel so lonely…"

Kendall will probably feel uncomfortable around me now since his slutty girlfriend told him. Why? Why did she tell him?! She know I don't stand a chance, that Kendall's straight and I'm not. I'm out of the ordinary, funny, odd…a queer.

I flinched at the word.

God, how I hate that word.

"Hey James, can I ask you something?"

(Kendall)

"It's Jo." I said glancing at my phone, earning a groan from James.

He seemed sad when I said it was Jo.

"What?"

"Oh nothing." He said with a hint gloom in voice, "I'll be in our room."

Then he walked off.

Poor guy, been having a bad day all day. Don't blame him.

With a sigh, I answered my phone.

"Kendall here."

"Hi Kendall." Jo said in her usually cheery voice.

"Hi Jo, how are you…" I asked, getting up and started walking acrossed the room…then back.

"Fine, you?"

"…I'm fine."

"Good, cause I really need to ask you something." She said, her voice sounded nervous. "do you, ya' know want to have sex?"

I was surprised at her sudden offer.

"Jo, I said no; I'm not ready for that yet, I've already told you a hundred times."

"Please Kendall!" I heard her begged.

"Jo please, we're in no rush, we can wait…."

"No we can't." she cried.

"…why do you want to now, anyway? I thought we both agree to wait until we're married?" I asked.

"Yeah but James-"

"What does this have to do with James?" I stopped pacing.

What does have to do with me and Jo having sex?

"I think he's crushing on you, Kendall. At the hospital he didn't seem to like me being there with you, didn't you see him be hateful to me when I asked him if he was okay? And when he ran away that day, I noticed him staring at us kissing before he stormed out."

"Wha- oh, how do you know that? You're probably just over-reacting…" I said reassuring.

James doesn't like me, he's too girl-obsessed to be. A womanizer, more like it.

"Kendall, I'm telling the truth, ask him!"

"Fine I'll go and ask him, if it makes you feel better; I'll call you back."

Sheesh, she's abit paranoid.

"James doesn't have a crush on me." I laughed to myself.

I opened the bedroom door and spotted him in bed.

"Hey James?"

He didn't say anything.

"James?"

Nothing.

"Must' have fallen asleep."

I walked over to my side of the room and fell onto my bed.

"Guess I'll turn in too, almost 8."

After that's all happened today, I'm exhausted.

I turned to look over at James, he laid very still, how could he have fallen asleep so fast?

_I think he's crushing on you, Kendall. _

James? Crushing on me? Impossible. He's way into girls to even be gay or to like me, in fact. And besides, if he did like me he would've told, right?

"Would he?"

After a while, I could hear the front door of the apartment slam and hear Logan grumble about something wild Camille did. Such a crazy girl that Camille. Then mom and Katie came a short while after that. When everyone finally went to bed, it was totally quiet.

Then out of now where, I heard James mumble something. I shifted towards him.

"Hey James, can I ask you something?"

Nothing.

"James?"

Still nothing.

"Oh come on James, I know you're not a sleep."

"…"

"Talk to me dammit!" I semi-yelled at him.

Again, the stubborn ass didn't say anything. So I threw my pillow at him.

"James I swear, if you don't answer me right now, I'm going to shave your head!"

He shot up and gave me an evil glare.

"You will not!" he said in protest.

"Then answer me next time I'm talking to you!" I shot back.

"Since when did you become my boss?"

"Why are you ignoring me?"

"I wasn't, I was asleep."

"Liar, tell the truth."

"I don't have to do anything you tell me," he hissed, "last time I checked, you're not my father!"

"I didn't say I was!"

"You didn't have to!"

"Will you just shut up?!" I yelled.

"Why should I?! You're the one who woke me up!"

"Oh please, don't lie to me, I know you weren't sleeping!" I huffed, rolling my eyes at his stupidness. "God knows, if you were sleeping, you'll be snoring."

"I don't snore!"

"How do you know? You're sleeping when you do it!"

"Why do you always have to be such a stubborn ass?!

"Because I wanted to ask you a simple question and you're just being difficult!"

"What if I don't want to answer, huh?!" His eyes narrowed.

"Why you such a drama queen?! You dumb fag!"

His mouth went gaped and he looked shock. He gripped his cover and I could tell he was about to cry.

"Oh god James, I didn't- I didn't mean to say that, I-"

"I HATE YOU!"

Before I could say anything, he fled from his bed and out the room, slamming the door behind him.

"James!" I shouted after him, but he didn't respond back. I heard a door slam; as quick as I could, I ran for the front door.

_Please don't let him run away again, please!_

(James)

"James!"

I could hear Kendall yell after me as I raced out of the room, tears threatening to spill over.

I can't believe it, Kendall called me a fag! He hates me, he hates that I like him. And now we're probably not going to be friends anymore…

"I'm so stupid."

Not sure what to do, I ran to the nearest door I came to: the bathroom.

Back pressed the door, I heard Kendall's footsteps rush through the living room and towards the front door.

My heart was racing so fast, that I had to take deeper breaths to catch up.

The door slammed and Kendall's footsteps thundered through the apartment as what I could hear, he went to wake Logan and Carlos.

"Guys! Guys, wake up!" I could hear the panic in his voice. A moment later, I could hear Logan too.

"Ugh Kendall, what's wrong with you? It's still dark out." He sound sleepy.

Carlos on the other hand, didn't want to wake up so he told them to shut up and went back to sleep.

"James, he's gone! He raced out of the apartment- I think he ran off again!"

"What?! Why?!" The sound of bed creaking and covers flying came from outside.

"I was being stupid, Jo told me he had a crush on me and I called him a- oh god, I didn't even ask him if he actually was- Logan, I didn't mean-"

"Whoa, whoa! What did you do?! I heard Logan's voice said, "and what did you call him?! Kendall, you didn't-"

"I'm so stupid! Why the hell did I even call him that-"

"Kendall! What did you do?!"

"I'll explain later, "Kendall said, "Come on, if we hurry, we might be able to catch up with him."

The front door slammed and the apartment went quiet once more.

CH7

"James sweetheart, it's about time you get off the bathroom floor."

"Mmhm…"

_Who's there? _

"_James_."

"Go away…" I mumbled. I rolled over onto my belly; the tiles were cold against my skin.

"I could but do you want Kendall finding you here instead?" the voice said.

"Fuck Kendall."

"Then get up."

I groaned and got to my feet slowly, still tired and felt like I could fall over any minute. Kiley was standing next to me with a friendly smile.

"Kiley, what are you doing here?"

"Didn't you want to see me?" she asked, "I thought you needed someone to talk to?"

Oh yeah, I forgot about that.

"Yeah, I did."

"So? How did it go?"

"I was right, Kendall does hate me." I said. The urge to cry was building inside me, "he called me- called me-"

Then I burst into tears.

_Jeez, I'm such a girl._

"I know, I know. There's no need to cry." She reassured, wrapping her arms around me, "he's not worth you tears."

"But- but its not- not fair!" I blubbered, "It's not fair!"

"I know…"

We stood there for a while, basically waiting for me to stop whining like a girl. Eventually, we heard the front door slam and I stop.

It was Mama Knight talking on her cell phone.

"Well, have you checked the gym? Maybe he's there burning off steam."

Her voice sound worried and showed a sign she was about to cry.

"What about the park? Rocque Studios?"

Kiley gave me a sad look,

_Poor thing, that woman_

_Yeah, she a worrier._

"I know, maybe they'll find him."

Who are _they_?

"Okay, you check there and I'll stay here if he decides to come home…okay love you."

She hung up and busted into tears.

Poor Mrs. Knight.

_Maybe you go in there and show her you're alright. _Kiley told me.

_What if Kendall's with her?_

_Did you hear anyone with her?_

_No b-_

_James…_

_Okay fine…can at least you come with me?_

_Sorry honey, she doesn't know me, it will be kind of weird seeing me and you coming out of the bathroom. _She smiled sadly,

_We don't want her to get the wrong idea, do we?_

_Guess not, see you later then?_

_Maybe_

And with that, she disappeared in thin air.

(Kendall)

"I checked the mall, he isn't there."

It has been nine hours since James has run off and so far no luck.

"Maybe he's at the Palmwoods." Carlos suggested for the fifth time.

_"Well, have you checked the gym? Maybe he's there burning off steam." _Mom said on the other end of the phone.

"No, he isn't there; it was the first place we checked." I said, "No James."

_"What about the park? Rocque Studios?"_

"No and no. Mom, I think it's time to call the police."

_"I know, maybe they'll find him."_

"Okay, I'll call them and then we'll check the park again, okay?"

Logan and Carlos stood next to me in silence, listening to what they had have to do next. They both looked tired.

Logan and I spent an hour looking for James before deciding to go and wake everyone else up to search for him. Camille and Guitar Dude were kind enough to help, Jo couldn't because a sudden interview came up and she couldn't get out of it to help.

_"Okay, you check there and I'll stay here if he decides to come home…okay love you."_

"Love you too." I hung up and looked at my tired friends.

"Any sign of him?" Logan asked, letting out a loud yawn.

"No, she said she'll stay home, you know, in case he comes home." I sighed, "I'm such an idiot."

"Yes you are." Carlos agreed.

"Shut it Carlos." I snapped.

"You said you're an idiot, I only agreed." He pointed out, leaning on Logan's shoulder, half asleep.

"Carlos, get off of me!" Logan shoved Carlos off and Carlos fell to the ground.

"Come on guys, knock it off." I said, "Logan, wake up Carlos while I dial 911."

"Do that later, can we go get something drink?" Carlos whined, "I'm dying!"

"You're not dying, you dimwit, now get up!" Logan said, kicking Carlos in the side.

"Ow! Don't, that hurts…" Carlos whimpered, rubbing his side.

Poor Carlos. He did look worn-out from all that walking we did. He was breathing heavy and his eyes were droopy. When he went to get up, Logan had to help just so he wouldn't fall over again.

"I think it's time we took a break, maybe go to McDonald's and rest for a while.

"I thought you hate McDonald's?" Carlos asked when he was finally standing on his own.

"I don't _hate McDonald's_; I just hate those people I worked with."

"Oh…" Carlos panted, "Okay, how far is it to the nearest McDonald's?"

"Not far, maybe a twenty minute walk or so. Do you think you can make it?"

"…maybe."

The walk wasn't bad but we had to stop every now and then to let Carlos take a break. He's never been this tired before so I was a bit worried about him. I would often asked him if he was sick or something but he always say he was fine. When the huge golden double arch came into view, I never thought I saw something as happy as Carlos.

"I see it! I see it!" he cried, having to take in a deep breath each time.

It wasn't even too crowded when we walked in. Only two people were at the counter and a couple were sitting down, enjoying they're meals.

The familiar smell of fries and pickles filled my nostrils with the sounds of employees in the back yelling to one another about orders.

Aah, the memories…gag.

"Guys, can I go and sit down, I starting to feel kind of dizzy." Carlos asked, already going to sitting area.

"Sure, hey what do you want us to get you?" I asked.

"Get me a McNugget Mighty Kidz Meal with a soft drink." He said over his shoulder.

"Mighty Kidz meal?" Logan's one eyebrow raised.

"Our Carlos will never grow up." I laughed.

Logan laughed and then we went up to the counter when the people in front were done.

"Hi, welcome to McDonald's, how may I help you on this fine day?"

A cheery young girl was at the counter, some where I'm guessing around the age fifth teen. Her bright blonde hair was tied back into a ponytail and she wore a sweet smile.

"Hi…uh," I quickly looked at her nametag, "Um yes Sierra, I would like to order a- Chicken Snack wrap –Grilled please- and a large coke with a side of fries, Logan?"

He step up to the counter, greeting her with a friendly smile.

"And I would like a Double cheeseburger, large fries and a iced tea- oh and McNugget Mighty Kidz Meal with a soft drink for a friend."

"Is that for here or to go?"

"For here." I said.

She got out a brown tray and sat it down on the counter.

"Okay, $13.45 is your total." She said, placing the receipt on the tray.

Logan got out his wallet and pulled out $15.

She took it and opened the register.

"$1.55 is your change. Your food will be ready in just a moment." She gave us a smile and went to greet another customer.

"Wonder why she didn't ask us an autograph." Logan said out loud.

"Why's that?" I asked.

"Well, she's near the age. You know, probably being a fan and all. She did seem excited when we stepped up to the counter."

"Oh, they're not supposed to have a personal conversation with a customer. It's considered rude."

"Really?" he chuckled.

"Yeah I know. Its seems abit stupid, doesn't it?"

"Yeah."

Minutes later, our food was ready and when we went to go sit at our table, we came across a sleeping Carlos.

"Carlos, hey man, wake up, your food's here."

"Mmhm…"

"Hey Carlitos, wake up or we'll leave you here when we're done."

"I feel sick…" he mumbled.

"So you don't want to eat anymore?" Logan asked, biting into his sandwich.

"Mmhm…"

"Alright then, we'll save your food for when we get home."

We ate in silence, Logan was the first to finish and Carlos still had his head down on the table. I was still eating my fries when Carlos said something.

"When can we go home?"

"When Kendall's finished eating-"

"Which is now," I said, throwing my food on to the tray, "I'll go throw our stuff, be right back, okay?"

I rather go home half-hungry than have a sick Carlos wait on me.

I got up and to take our trey to the trashcan. Tossing anything into the bin and laying the trey with the rest. When I turned around I almost bump into the same cashier we met earlier.

"Oh! Sorry, didn't mean to get in your way, sir-" she blushed, completely embarrassed.

"Sir? I don't look that old, do I?" I joked, she blushed even more.

"N-no, not at all, I'm just being polite, sorry…"

"It's okay, name's Kendall."

"I know, you're from the band Big Time Rush…" she said in a shy voice.

Logan was right.

"Yea and it's okay. You didn't offend me or anything." I said with a friendly smile.

"Oh okay…I like you're music, it's very good."

Well that was random.

"Really? Thanks." I said. "We work really hard to make good. I'm glad you like it."

She smiled.

"So are you guys having a day out?"

"Yea sorta."

"Where's James? Is he sick or something?"

"Sorta."

Yeah, sick of me.

"Kendall!"

"What?" I turned to look but what I saw was bloodcurdling.

Sierra screamed and we both ran over to the guys.

Carlos was lying on the ground, having the same episode James had at Rocque Records.

"Oh god, Carlos!"

His body was jerking and twitching all at once. Eye rolled back and mouth gaped.

"Is he getting an element too?" I whispered to Logan, not wanting Sierra to hear.

"I don't know, he might be just having a seizure." Logan said, turning Carlos over.

"Kiley said that the other three elements were still roaming around for a host though, maybe one picked Carlos!"

Carlos gave out a sharp gasp, arching his back with a look of pain on his face.

"M-m-make I-it stop! Please s-stop!" He cried, "Please!"

"Somebody call 911!" Sierra yelled to someone.

"It going to be okay, Carlos. Relax." Logan hushed, gripping his shoulder.

"L-Logan, it hurts…" he sobbed, gripping Logan's hands. "I can't b-breathe, I suffocating!"

He let out another cry, jerking up off the ground and falling back down, hitting his head hard.

"We have to move him before he really hurts himself, get him home or something!" I took Carlos by the arms and began to lift him.

"How?! We have no car and it twelve blocks to the Palmwoods!"

"Take him and I'll call Guitar Dude, he can give us a lift in his van."

"But I thought Jenny wreck his van?!"

"He got it fixed."

Logan took Carlos, struggling to keep ahold of him since Carlos wouldn't stay still. I quickly got out my phone and dialed Guitar Dude.

_"Sup, Guitar Dude here." _

"Guitar Dude, it's me Kendall. I need you to come and get us-"

_"Did'ya find James? Where was he?"_

Oh shit, I forgot about James.

"No we didn't him find yet." I explained, "But I think Carlos had some sort of heat stroke and now he's having a seizure, he needs to get back to the Palmwoods!"

"Whoa chill man, don't worry, I'll come and get'cha. Where are you?"

"At that one McDonald's closest to the Palmwoods."

_"Why are you at McDonald's? I thought you hate McDonald's; is James__ there-"_

"No James isn't here and will you please come get us?!"

_"Okay, okay, Jeez. I'm on my way..."_

With that, he hung up and I turned back to Carlos. I guess Logan was having a difficult time holding on to him, so he laid Carlos back down on the floor. The whole restaurant was watching, customers sat and watch while the employees came out from behind the counter to see what the noise was about. Carlos crying from the pain, tugged on Logan's shirt helplessly, wanting him to do something to make it stop.

"Logan…help me please?" he whimpered.

Logan gave him a sympathetic look and squeezed his hand gently. He couldn't do anything to help. Carlos cried even more.

"Logan! Please, make it stop, make it- I-"

He stopped talking, arched his back again and let out a scream. Logan jumped a little and looked at me.

"Kendall-"

"I know." I didn't know what to say.

(Carlos)

The pain was everywhere. My body was fidgeting out of control and I couldn't breathe. I don't know what happened; I was laying my head on the table then on the floor within a second.

"Logan…help me please?" I pulled on his shirt, trying to get his attention.

_You're somewhat a Doctor, do something! _

His face went sad and squeezed my hand. His eyes told me there was nothing he could do which made me cry even more.

"Logan! Please, make it stop, make it- I-"

Outta nowhere a sharp hard pain slammed into my back and I screamed. It hurt so much.

"Kendall-"

"I know."

Know what?!

"Guys!" I screamed.

They just sat there beside me, not even bothering to move. People around us where watching us like some soap opera.

Freaks.

I turned to Kendall.

"K- Kendal- all? Please?"

"It's going to be okay Carlos, just relax."

He smiled at me and turned to talk to Logan. He's going to let me die!

"Kendall please, don't let me die! I'm sorry I called you an idiot! I-"

"Shhh Carlos, it will be over soon." Logan said in a soothing voice.

"No! Please don't let me die! Please- No!" I screamed, pulling Logan's shirt even harder; tears rolling down his cheeks.

"Calm down Carlos, no one going to let you die."

Logan went to move me and rested my head on his lap, looking down at me.

My arms and legs sudden went limp and heavy. Everything went black.

(James)

"Why on earth were you in the bathroom?" Mama Knight asked, seating down on the couch, "why didn't you tell us where you were at?"

"Because Kendall- and I sorta got into a fight…" I lied.

"About what?"

"Well, I'm not sure if I want to say, it's private." I blushed.

"I won't say anything."

"I'm not sure-" She rosed a brow, "but if you promise not to tell, I guess I can tell you…"

"I won't tell a soul." She said. She sound serious.

"And you won't get upset?"

"What did'ya break?" she let out a sigh.

"I didn't break anything."

Silence.

"…"

"…"

"…okay, what's so private." She asked.

Here it goes.

"Well, I –uh, well, I've been going through these changes..." I started off.

"Uh-huh." She said, asking me to continue.

"And actually, I went through these changes long before we came to LA." I pointed out, looking away from her. "And I don't know exactly how to explain it-"

"James."

"Huh?" I turned back to her.

"Honey, are you trying to tell me that you're gay?"

"Bi actually." I said with a weak grin.

"Was that why you and Kendall were fighting?"

"Yes."

She gave me a sympathetic smile.

"What did he say?"

"Nothing that bad…"

"Bad enough for you run off?"

"Well…"

"What did he say?" She ask again.

"He called me a-" I choked with a sob.

"A what?" Her face went stern.

"A fag."

She didn't say anything but got up and walked to the kitchen.

"I will be talking to him when he gets back." She said, mostly to herself.

"Oh, don't do that. I don't want him hating me anymore." I said uneasily.

"James, he shouldn't have called you that, that is a disgusting word and shouldn't of came out of his mouth."

She opened a cabinet and pulled out a box of Trix.

"James hon, eat a bowl of cereal, I have to go check on Katie."

"What's wrong with her?"

"Still sick."

"But I thought it was a 24 hour thing?"

"Guess it's not."

"Didn't you guys go shopping yesterday?"

"Yeah but as soon as we got home she starting throwing up again."

"Oh."

She left but I bother to get up; I wasn't hungry, I was too upset to eat.

Mama Knight knows I'm bi and she doesn't care.

_Hon, I think she already knew_

How's that?

_She guessed it, didn't she?_

Yeah

_And she didn't look so surprised._

True

(Logan)

"Pull to the curb; we'll walk the rest of the way there!"

Guitar Dude pulled over and we dragged Carlos out of the van; Kendall hoisted him over his shoulder and headed inside.

"Are you sure ya don't want to go to the hospital?" Guitar Dude questioned, "He looks pretty bad."

"He's fine; just needs a little shade and water." I said waving goodbye, setting out after Kendall.

"Kendall, hold the elevator!" I shouted, dodging the people in lobby but stopped in front of Mr. Bitters, who came out from behind his desk.

"What on earth are you doing?!" He asked in a harsh tone, pointing at Carlos, "This is a hotel not-"

"Sorry Mr. Bitters no time! I'm in a hurry!" I said going around him and headed for the elevator. "Sorry!"

Just before he got to shouting at us, the doors slide shut and the elevator moved. Kendall laid Carlos on the floor and Carlos let out a painful moan.

"Why'dya put him down?" I asked.

"He'd got heavy." He said simply.

I rolled my eyes at him. Sometimes I wish I could just smack some sense into him.

Once the elevator stopped at our floor Kendall pick Carlos back up and we raced towards 2J.

"Just bring him to our room; we don't want your mom worrying." I said as I turned the knock to our apartment door.

"Got it." He agreed.

When stepped through the door, at first I couldn't believe it.

James was sitting at the table eating a bowl of cereal.

We stopped in our tracks and just stared at him. He merely just glanced up at us and went back to eating his cereal. He didn't bother to ask if Carlos was okay.

Awkward silence.

"I'm…going to take Carlos to your guy's room." Kendall awkwardly, heading to my room.

"Okay." Was all I could say.

Kendall left; James and I were the only ones in the room.

"James."

"Yeah?" he mumbled.

"…"

He looked up.

"What is it, Logan?" He looked sad.

I sighed and sat down next to him. I couldn't be mad at him.

"Are you alright?" I asked.

"Yes." He took another bit of his cereal.

"Where were you, we looked everywhere."

"Here."

What?

"You were here."

"Yeah."

"All-night."

"Yes."

"And we were looking for you for no reason."

"Looks like it."

"But Kendall said you ran from the apartment."

"Kendall lied."

"Why would he lie?"

"Why would call me a fag?" He asked in obscene tone.

"I don't know, why would he?"

"I don't know!" He snapped, slamming down his spoon. I flinched to his sudden attack. "Because he's dirty bastard who doesn't feel any remorse for others!"

_Touchy._

He folded his arms and lay back in his chair. Is it just me or is there smoke rising from him?

"James, I'm sure he didn't mean to call you that and besides, why would it bother you? It's not like you actually gay, right?"

He didn't answer.

"James?"

He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath.

"Please don't hate me."

"You are?" He was?

"I'm sorry." He said in sad voice.

He's gay? James, the guy who dated five girls in a week; gay. Didn't expect that.

"James, I'm not mad."

He opened his eyes with shock.

"You're not?"

"Of course not, why would I? It's your business, not mine." I said with sympatric smile. "And besides, you're one of mine closest best friends."

"Kendall doesn't care." He pouted.

"Kendall's not a bright guy." I pointed out.

"So it still hurt when he called me that."

"I know but still; Kendall's not a bright guy."

He smiled.

"Thanks Logan."

"For what?"

"For understanding."

(Kendall)

James had a sad expression when he looked up at us. When he looked at me, he looked a bit ashamed. I felt my face grow hot.

"I'm…going to take Carlos to your guy's room."

As fast as I could, I walked past James and went into Logan and Carlo's room. Carlos groaned softly as I placed him on his bed.

"Where…am…I?" He asked.

"In your room, Logan said for you to lie down and rest."

He say anything else back, so I guess he blacked out again.

As I turned to head back to the living room, I stopped. Maybe I shouldn't go back in there just yet. James looked pretty upset.

I groaned.

_God, I'm just an idiotic dumbass._

_Why did I have to call him that?! Why did I call him that?!_

_I'm not a homophobe, and I've never called a person that before._

I slumped down in front of the door and grumbled.

I could hear James and Logan from the kitchen; guess they're talking about how much of a dick I am.

"I wish I could change what I said…" Tears were threatening to spill, my chin quivering. "…I wish I could."

But I can't and James wouldn't take an apology for what I said. I don't blame him.

_Was it because Jo said he liked me?_

Did I just over-react?

"_I think he's crushing on you, Kendall."_

Does he like me? I never asked if he did. I just assumed.

So what if he does, I should have known better.

Poor James.

_I could do what I did back in Minnesota when I hurt someone. I could hurt me._

I shooked the thought out of my head.

_No, I can't do that; I went too far last time._

Too far.

…

But I _do_ deserve it.

I got up and opened the door; James was no longer eating and was sitting on the couch with Logan watching a show. I didn't know what it was about but I didn't care. Logan looked up at me; his expression told me that he will be talking with later. I zipped pasted them and headed to the bathroom, I could hear the shuffle on the couch to where they watched me go in. and I swear I heard Logan say something.

_I deserve it I deserve it I deserve it_

Quickly, I rummaged through the medicine cabinet till I stumbled upon one of mom's razors.

It was a disposable one so it was easy to break it open. The blade popped out and landed in my hand with ease.

Just a few cuts, that's all.

Back in Minnesota, I use to do this all the time when I was having a hard time or I've made myself an idiot in public. It felt good; like I was punishing my own self and that it would make everything better. I never told anyone, well, except Katie. She noticed straight away when I'd freaked out about her giving me an Indian burn on my arm. I made her promise not to tell anyone but she kept insisting I stopped. She said it wasn't healthy and I would end up dead.

At first I didn't listen but then one day, I cut deeper than I should and bleed for hours. Katie helped me stop the bleeding. She cried that day. Told me to never to it again.

"I'm sorry baby sister." The blade sliced acrossed the skin of my right arm. I bite my lip in agony.

Damn, I forgot how much this hurts.

The blood drew from the gash and dripped off onto the floor.

I smiled.

I deserved it.

I made another cut. It wasn't as bad as the first one but still strung. The line of blood ran along my arm and connected with the first stream of blood.

Suddenly I came to my senses and dropped the blade.

"Just a slip." I said.

I grabbed a nearby towel and pressed it to my arm.

"Just a slip."

CH8

(James)

"What do you think he's doing in there?" Logan asked, still staring at the bathroom door.

"Who cares?" I said moodily. "I'm going to bed."

He looked at me like he was about to say something but instead he just nodded.

"Good night."

Once I closed the door I went straight to my bed. The mattress creaked when I collapsed onto it and the sheets felt cool to the touch. So soft. So much better than sleeping on the bathroom floor.

I probably should go to sleep before Kendall comes in, I don't want to face his drama. He probably hates me now.

_You'll never know James; he might be feeling really bad for it._

Oh really? Why hasn't he said anything? Like I'm sorry?!

"Kiley, why don't you come sit by me when you want to talk? It's really annoying when you pop in my head."

_Sorry but I don't want to risk being seen by your guardian._

What harm will it do?

_She'll get suspicious James. She would want to know who I am and why I was with a teenage boy. Awkward questions I would not like to answer._

Oh.

I groaned.

I'm so tired.

I sunk deep into the blankets and began to dose off.

Good night Kiley.

_Good night James._

(Carlos)

The forest was full of animals; lions, monkeys, pythons, etc. The trees stood tall and evergreen while the ground below was covered in grass and vines. I could hear a waterfall nearby.

It was a beautiful place; so calm and peaceful.

I smiled.

As I walked along the trees, I noticed that I was wearing different clothes than I was at McDonald's.

Wait, how did I get here?

Just a while ago, I was at McDonald's dying.

Am I dead? No, I can't be; I remember talking to Kendall after that. So I must be dreaming.

I can deal with that.

"Carlos." A voice from behind said.

What was that? I turned around but no one was there. I could only hear animals close by.

"Hello? Is someone there?" I asked.

Nothing. Everything went quiet when I spoke, even the animal noises died down.

It spoke again.

"Carlos."

It was closer.

"Who's there?" I asked, more scared, "Go away!"

"Come with me."

Like hell I will.

I stepped back and bumped into a tree. Something stepped closer and went from tree to tree.

"Come with me to the waterfall." It said, the voice was calm and friendly, "Don't be afraid."

"N- No." I was afraid.

"Come with me."

"Carlos?"

I awoke back in my room lying in bed. The forest and voice was gone. Logan was sitting beside me with a glass of water and with a worried look

"Are you okay?" he asked, handing me the glass.

"Yea…bad dream."

I sat up and took a sip.

"What time is it?"

"Around nine." He said, taking the glass and sat it down on the nightstand. "How are you feeling?"

"Good but I've seen better days."

He laughed.

"Yea, I guess you have."

"Yea," I said before a thought came to mind, "did you guys find James?"

He nodded his head.

"Where was he?"

"Here all along."

"Where?"

"Don't know, didn't ask."

"Did James and Kendall make up?" I asked.

"Don't know."

He got up and took the glass.

You should go back to sleep and get some rest." He went to walk off but I stopped him.

"Hey Logan?"

He turned back to me.

"Yea?"

"Did I get an element?"

He just smiled.

(James)

The sudden slam of the door startled me and I woke up with a jump. Kendall walked in and headed for me; he had something in his hands.

It looked like a piece of paper.

"Kendall?"

He jumped when I spoke; guess he thought I was still asleep.

He eyes were glassy and red. Has he been crying?

"James I-" He choked on the urge of tears.

Instead he just gave the paper to me and went to his bed.

I unfolded the paper and read it. It was hardly readable from his sloppy handwriting but was even more unreadable from the smugs and wet splotches.

_I'm sorry_

That's it?

I'm sorry? He calls me a fag and all he can say is I'm sorry?

I looked up to him and he was watching cautiously; he was crying again.

Should I forgive him?

"Kendall-"

"I'm sorry James" He cried, "Really I am."

"Then why did'ya say it?" I asked, still pondering whether forgive him or not.

"Because I'm an idiot." He stated, "Because I'm a careless dick."

He looked away from me and started to cry some more.

"Please forgive me, it was wrong of me to say that."

"Yes it was." I said, still in bitch mode.

"I know but Jo said-"

"Why would she make a difference?"

"S- She said you had a cr- crush on me and I just over-re- reacted." He was crying even harder.

He looked so pitiful. I'm such a pushover.

I got out of bed and walk over to him; wrapping him in my arms and patting his calmly.

"It's alright Kendall, calm down" I said soothingly.

He grabbed onto me and cried into my shoulder.

"I- I'm sorry!" he bawled, "pl- plea- please don't h- hate me!"

"I don't."

We sat like that what seem like hours; he cried while I comfort. I know I'm supposed to be pissed for what he said but I still loved him and can't stand it when he cries.

"I'm sorry."

"I know."

The morning sun woke me and I found myself still holding Kendall. We've lain back onto his bed and just fell to sleep. He was still clinging to me and breathing lightening into my shoulder.

_Awwwww…_

_ "James! Kendall! Get up, we need to go!"_

Kendall woke up with a yelp.

Damn Logan.

Kendall released his grip and sat up awkwardly; I got up without a word and went get some clean clothes.

"We'll be there in a minute Logan!" I shouted. I completely forgot proms tonight and Gustavo needs us to do sound check.

"Um James?"

Ah man.

"Yes?" I answered, trying to show no interest in what he has to say. I may have let him off the hook for calling me a fag but I'm still going to give him the cold shoulder.

"About last night, I'm sorry I broke down like that and you shouldn't of forgave that easy either." He said with a lazy tone.

"I know."

"But I am really sorry," he said, "and I hope you'll forgive me. Your my best friend and I was totally out of line-"

"Kendall."

"Yeah?"

"Shut up, I forgive you; now will you get dress already? Gustavo waiting for us to do sound check."

I turned to look at him but he was suddenly by my side and pulling me into a hug.

I yelped with shock.

"Kendall!"

He looked at me and smiled.

"What?" he asked.

I scowled.

"WILL YOU GUYS HURRY UP, GUSTAVO'S GOING TO KILL US!" Carlos yelled from the next room.

Kendall let go, and rushed to get dress. I forced on a pair of pants and a shirt without saying another word.

"Why is it so hard for you dogs to get here _on time_?!" Gustavo yelled, as soon as we walked through the door. Of course we were late and since we're having the prom at his mansion, we were later than we would have been if we went to the studio.

"We overslept." Kendall replied, "What do we have to do?"

"Well, since you finally-"

"_We_ don't have to do nothing," Wayne-Wayne interrupted, "Just sound check."

"That's something, isn't it?" Kendall retorted.

"Hey James, heard you're queer now, is it true?" Wayne-Wayne said, ignoring Kendall.

"Where'd you hear that from?!" I snapped.

He grinned devilishly. "Oh, just around."

Kelly and Gustavo looked at me and I looked down to the floor.

"So it is true." Wayne-Wayne laughed, "Guess I shouldn't be surprised, you look the part."

"That's enough, dude." Carlos hissed, ready to tackle him at any moment.

"Or what? You'll hurt me?!"

"Wayne-Wayne, stop it, we don't need conflict." Logan pleaded.

"Shut up nerd-"

"SHUT UP! " Carlos yelled, about to swing a punch at him.

Suddenly the whole room began to shake, all the workers setting up the decorations set off in all directions screaming. Kelly dropped her clip board and Gustavo grabbed on to the nearest table.

"Earthquake!" Logan screamed, "Everyone, take cover!"

And everyone seemed to do just that. Carlos and Logan went to hide under one of the prom tables, while Kendall quickly ran between a doorframe.

"James, move!" He shouted towards me.

_Move James!_

My legs automatically began to move and brought me to a table. I sat down, held on to the table tightly and closed my eyes.

All of a sudden, it stopped.

_What the-_

"Is it over?!" Wayne-Wayne cried.

"I think so." Logan uttered from under his table, "Is everyone okay?"

"I am!" Someone yelled.

More responses.

"James, you okay?"

I opened my eyes and Kendall was looking at me with one arm extended towards me.

"Yea, just shooked abit."

I took his hand and he pulled me up. Then I noticed the blood.

"Kendall, you're bleeding." I stated.

He looked down and quickly grasped his bloody arm.

"Oh no…"

"Are you okay? I asked. "How did you get it, does it hurt?"

"Guess I got cut during the quake." He said stressfully.

"But your shirt not ripped."

"Maybe bumped into something hard." He turned and ran off. "I'm going to the bathroom real quick."

"Okay." I said quietly.

(Kendall)

Shit, shit, shit!

James saw my arm bleed! My cuts broke open!

Thankfully, no one was in the restroom when I got there. Quickly, I pulled up my sleeve and sure enough, blood was gushing out of yesterday's wound.

"Damn."

I grabbed for the paper towels and held it against my arm, cursing under my breath.

"That's a nasty cut you got there, Ken-dork."

Fuck me.

"Fuck off, Wally." I snarled at him, almost threatening him.

He grinned. "What if I don't?"

"I'm not in the mood for games-"

"Who said I was playing games?" He asked in a fake innocent voice, "I just want to know how my buddy got hurt."

I responded with a laugh.

"There's no way I'm your buddy."

"So how did you get?"

I turned to face him with glare.

"Weren't you here? Hello! An earthquake just happen about five minutes ago!"

"But nothing fell on you."

"How do you know, you're ass was shaking under some table in there…"

He smiled again, "Because I was watching you."

I didn't say anything. He laughed.

"What? The big Kendall Knight doesn't have a come back? I'm shocked."

I gritted my teeth. "What do you want?"

"So are you cutting yourself" he asked, ignoring me.

"What do you want, Wally!" I scowled.

"What do I want? To keep quiet?" He was grinning a huge smile.

I wanted tell him to fuck off…but what if he does tell someone? I would get in loads of trouble and everyone would mad at me, especially Katie.

"…yes…"

"I want to sing the lead in tonight's dance."

"At prom?"

"Yea and I don't want you in it at all."

You son-of-a-bitch.

"Gustavo won't let me just bail."

I'm right, he won't.

"Pretend to be sick."

And with that, he left.

(James)

It was around six a-clock when we were dressed and ready for night's prom. At the final rehearsal, Kendall said he couldn't perform because he said he fell during the earthquake and hit his neck against something and it hurt when he talks. So now Wayne-Wayne gets to sing lead and Kendall with have to sit in the crowd.

At about seven-fifty-three, our class-mates began to show, even-ugh- Jo.

She was, of course, wearing this skin tight dress that was trimmed about way too short and wearing 6-inch heels (not in actual show). Kendall smiled at her and took her hand.

Grrrr….

"Dog, snap out of it!"

I jumped and looked at Gustavo. "Sorry…"

He shooked his head and went back to talking.

Ever since Gustavo and Kelly found out I was gay- scratch that- Bi, I felt really uncomfortable being around them.

They never showed any disapproval of me, but I still felt like they don't like the thought of it.

"As I was saying, the prom will officially begin in three- no, two minutes- so you guys will start then. You'll start out with Nothing Even Matters," he said, pointing at small list in his hand. "And since Kendall is having "throat problems", Wayne-Wayne will take his place, understand?"

"Yes." We all said.

"Good."

(Kendall)

"Kendall, please?"

"Jo, I said no."

She frowned.

We were near the back of the room, sitting alone. Everyone else was watching the guys sing. The first song is over and they started on a new song ours, _Music Sounds Better With You_. And since I don't want my secret out, Wayne-Wayne is in my place and I'm in the crowd.

"But-"

"We're not happening sex." I said with noticeable tone.

"Why not?" She pleaded, sitting at the edge of seat.

"We're at prom!" I stated.

"In huge mansion!" she nearly yelled, "with thousands of empty rooms, no one will even notice we're gone."

_I can think of one._

I looked up towards the stage, James was smiling as sang. He looked happy.

I don't want to hurt him again.

"Jo, just end it."

"Why? We're dating, we love each other!" she whined. "Why is it so hard for you?!"

"It's not hard-"

"Don't you love me?"

I looked at her and I could see the tears begin to fall. She gave a loud sob and dropped her head in pitiful way.

"Of course I love you, don't cry." I begged. "Jo-"

"I'll be right back; I need to the ladies' room."

"Jo-"

She got up and went through the crowd, not even giving me a second glance.

Well hell.

It's not that I don't love her, it's just…it doesn't feel right. I mean, what if someone finds out? I don't think I can stand my mom finding out or the guys…and James.

I looked back up at him and he caught my eye. He smiled and waved to me and I waved back.

_Does he like me?_ The question gave me butterflies; a kind of excitement.

I shook my head. _No, I'm dating Jo! I can't think like that!_

Wait, do I like him?

(Logan)

As soon as we sang our final song, I was off the stage and looking for Camille. She said she would come back from New York earlier for prom and go back to film the next day. I only had one night with her and I wanted to spend much time with her as I can. It didn't take long till I found her; she was wearing a stunning sapphire dress, strapless, and her hair pulled back.

Beautiful.

"Hey, Camille..." I grinned, grabbing her by her waist and pulling her into a hug.

She squealed. "Logan!"

I laughed. I knew she hates it when I do that but I just love her reaction.

"Yes?" I asked in an innocent voice.

"Stop that." She giggled.

I let her go and she slaps me playfully on the shoulder. (Thankfully not the face.)

"Great show. I loved that new song…" she paused. "Why didn't Kendall sing?"

"Said his throat hurt."

Her eyebrow rose in disbelief. "Really? I just saw him talking to Jo just a moment ago and he sound just fine yelling at her."

"He yelled at Jo? What for?"

"Beats me. I wasn't close enough to hear what they were talking about." She shrugged.

(Carlos)

"Hey James!"

He jumped with a squeal. I laughed.

"Will you stop that?" he snapped.

"Why? Are you afraid someone is going to sneak up on you?" I asked.

He was hiding behind a potted plant, big enough to cover him completely.

"No."

"Then why are you hiding here?"

"Why is it any your business?"

And then I noticed Kendall sitting near us. Close enough to eavesdrop on.

"Are you spying on Kendall?"

"No." His face was going red.

Ah-huh. Sure.

"Why?" I asked.

"Why what?"

"Why are you spying on Kendall?"

"I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

"You are; you're snooping on Kendall."

"No one says 'snooping' Carlos."

He huffed and began to move away from me. I followed.

"Why won't you tell?" I whined, taking a seat at the table he sat down at.

"Why are you pestering me tonight?"

"Because."

"How much of the candy did you eat off the buffet table?"

"Just a little." I grinned.

That was lie, I ate a lot.

Damn, skittles. _**I love tasting the fucking rainbow.**_

"Whatever…" Clearly, he doesn't want to talk.

"You know, you could always start a conversation with him."

He looked at me with confusion on his face. "With who?"

"With Kendall." I giggled.

"Why would I do that?"

I wiggled my eyebrows. "Because you _like_ him…."

He eyes widened.

"I do not." He looked away from me and pretends to listen to song that was playing.

_Dreaming Of You _by Selena. Not Selena Gomez but the beautiful Hispanic girl, who was tragically shot down by her manager.

Sheesh, I hope Gustavo never tries that.

"Oh please." I said in dull tone. "Don't lie, you adore him. I can tell."

"Oh yeah?" he asked sarcastically. "Since when?"

"About a year ago." I explained, "You're easy to read man."

He looked at me. He looked scared.

"Also, Logan confirmed it last night."

"He told you?" He looked like he was about to cry.

Now I feel bad.

_Cheer him up._

I jumped.

"Who's there?" I blunted out.

James raised a brow.

_Make him feel better._

I looked at James and smiled as nothing happened.

"Don't be sad." I said to him. "I'm okay with you crushing on him."

"Really?" He sniffled.

"Yea."

He smiled back.

"But it doesn't guarantee I won't tease." I snickered.

And then he frowns. "You wouldn't dare."

"Try me."

I laughed and James cracked smile.

We sat there for a while. Not saying anything; just sitting. Dreaming Of You ended and our new song _No Idea_ began. I couldn't help but smile.

"What's so funny?" he asked.

"Oh, nothing."

CH10

(Kendall)

"I'm back."

I looked up at Jo. She wasn't crying anymore, actually smiling. She sat down with two cups of punch in hands then handed me one.

"It took you while, are you alright?" I asked.

She must have been crying for god-knows-how-long; I mean, her eyes were a bit puffy and red.

"I'm fine," she said in a more cheerful way. "I brought you some punch."

She scooted mine closer to me. I smiled.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

I took a few sips and at first it gave some unusual taste. Was it too sweet? Tangy?

"What favor is this?"

"Oh, some tropical kind. I don't know. Why do you ask?"

"Oh nothing."

She smiled at me and took a sip out of her own cup.

"Kendall?"

"Yea?" I asked, drinking another mouthful of punch.

She hesitated.

"What? You can tell me."

"It's about James."

Ugh, not this again.

"What about him?" I asked in an irritated tone.

"Well?"

"Well what?"

She gave an impatient glare.

"Does he, ya know…" she looked around to make sure no one listening in. "…likes you?"

I thought for a minute.

"I don't know, he might not even be gay."

"Didn't you ask him?"

"No." I took another sip.

"Will you?" This time there was a tone in her voice.

"Why are you so interested in James' sexuality?"

There was a pause. She didn't say anything and looked down to the table.

"Because I think he's trying to steal you from me."

I laughed.

"You think James is trying to steal me?"

"Yes."

"Don't tell me you're getting jealous over James."

"I'm not jealous, " She sucked in some air. "I just don't like the way he looks at you."

"Looks at me?" I couldn't help but smirk a little.

James looks at me?

"Yea, like a sad puppy." She smirked.

Okay, now Jo's just being mean. Even James likes me, she shouldn't hate him for it and he's been my friend ever since kindergarten; I'm not going to sit here and listen to this.

I gulped down the rest of the punch and got up. After a dizzy spell from sitting too long, gave her a look and turned to walk off.

I could her right behind me.

"Wait, I'm sorry!" she cried, then grabbed my hand. "Kendall, please don't be mad."

I turned around to look at her.

"I'm not mad, I- I just wish you would stop." I said, gripping her hand that already had ahold of me.

"Stop?"

"Stop obsessing over James. He's just a friend, I promise." A sad jolt went threw me.

I smiled and she smiled back.

"Can we get back to having fun tonight?"

"Yea and maybe a bit romantic."

"Sure." I cupped her face and kissed her gently.

She wrapped her arms around my neck and we began to sway to the music. I pulled away and she laid head on my shoulder as I sat my hands on her waist.

I closed my eyes and breathed in her beautiful scent.

"Kendall?"

"Yea?"

"It's a bit noisy in here, can we go some were its quiet?" she asked, "so we can talk?"

"Sure."

(James)

"So when did you start to like guys?" Carlos asked between bites of pizza.

"I don't like guys, just Kendall; the rest are girls."

"Kendall's the only guy you like?" He raised a brow.

"Yea."

"What about Kendall?" a voice sneered.

Oh no.

"Get lost Wayne-Wayne." I said dully, "I'm not in the mood."

"I bet you would be if I was Kendall." He laughed, taking a sit next to us.

"Fuck you." I snapped.

"Sorry but no thanks." He said over-dramatically, "I don't play for your team."

"It wasn't an offer dumbass." Carlos said, crossing his arms, "How about you go somewhere where you're wanted."

"Naw, I fine right here."

"Oh really? You like hanging out with people who hate your guts and don't want anything to do with you? Wow that says something about your character." Carlos laughed, "You know what, I think he just wants to sit by us so he can look cool."

I looked at Carlos with shock. No way, he's ever been this mean to a person, not even Gustavo. I looked back to Wayne-Wayne. He looked pale and abit shock as well. But then his face turned into rage.

"Fuck you, Garcia." Wayne-Wayne got up and walked off.

"Sorry, don't play for your team!" Carlos yelled after him.

He looked at me. "What?"

"Carlos, that was…well, mean."

"Yeah, so? I'm tired of his crap."

"Who's crap?"

Logan sat down next to me.

"Oh, our new band member." Carlos smirked.

"What did he do?"

"Tried to mess with James."

Logan groaned.

"Yea, saying how James would in the mood if he was Kendall."

"Speaking of Kendall-"

"Can we please just drop this!" I snapped at them, "I don't to listen to it."

"I think you would want to hear this; Camille just told me she heard Kendall yelling at Jo."

"For what?" I asked.

"Don't know but he was yelling and I thought his throat hurt too bad to talk."

"Was he lying?" Carlos asked.

We all looked over to Kendall's table. He wasn't there and so wasn't Jo.

"Do you think he blew off singing us so he could be with Jo?" I asked.

That hurts.

"Maybe, tomorrow she's going to New Zealand to shoot a movie." Logan explained. "Don't know when she's coming back."

That caught my attention.

"Jo's leaving? Tomorrow?"

That's why Jo's being so bitchy lately. She thinks that while she's gone, I'll have a chance to take Kendall away from her.

She thinks I'm actually capable of hooking up with him.

"Where do you think they're at?" Carlos rose out of his seat and looked across the room, "I don't see them anywhere."

"Maybe went somewhere where it's quiet." Logan said, scanning the room too. "It has gotten a lot louder in here."

Or that hag seduced him and they're off somewhere having sex.

Yeah, I remembered that phone call.

"You don't think they'll…ya know…."

Logan and Carlos looked at me.

"They're what?" Logan asked confused.

I blushed. God, I don't want to have to explain this to them.

"Well, before Kendall and I fought yesterday-"

"You mean, Kendall acting like an idiot." Logan pointed out, "You didn't do anything."

"Yea um, well…before that, Kendall got a call from Jo-"

"So? Do you think she's the reason Kendall acted like a jerk?" Carlos interjected.

"I know it was her, she was the one who told Kendall I like him and she ask him to have sex with her."

They went silent.

"So you think they're off somewhere having sex?" Logan asked.

"Yea, I do."

"Why would they do it here? In a crowded place?"

"Yea wouldn't they get caught?" Carlos pointed out.

"I think she wants to get caught," I sighed, sliding downing into my chair, "She knows I like him and she wants to make sure I know who he belongs to."

"You don't know that-"

"Maybe we should look for them; Miss Knight won't like it if she found out." Carlos said hopping out of his chair.

"Wait, we don't even know if they're actually doing it." Logan grabbed Carlos by the arm and pulled him back into his chair.

"Yea but James said-"

"James also has the habit of jumping to conclusions." Logan pointed out.

"Hey I'm right here and I do not."

"Yes you do." They both said.

Suddenly the music stopped and the sound of the Mic came to.

"Excuse me but I'm looking for my daughter, Jo Taylor."

I looked up to the stage and there stood a very angry Mr. Taylor, a man who no one would like to piss off.

He looked over the room once and then again.

"Jo Taylor, please come to the stage now."

Instead of Jo, Gustavo came to the stage.

"Um what do you think you are doing!?"

"Looking for my daughter, I did not give her permission to be here."

"I don't care if you gave permission or not, you don't have authority to stop this dance." Gustavo shot back at Mr. Taylor, grabbing the Mic from him.

They weren't necessary talking into the mic. (Like overly-dramatic WWE wrestlers) but they were speaking loudly enough for everyone to here. Then Jo came out of nowhere and to the stage.

With no Kendall.

"Hey where's Kendall?" I whispered to Logan.

He looked acrossed the room, "I don't know."

Jo went on stage, looking guilty as ever, and to her dad.

"What were you thinking, young lady?! In a few hours you have to be on a plane to New Zealand and you're here when you should be in bed!"

Mr. Taylor then grabbed her by the arm and began to haul her way.

"Dad, please stop! I need to do something before we leave! I need to tell Kendall-"

"I don't care; you can call him later when you're on the plane."

"Dad, he doesn't know I'm leaving!"

The music came back on and kids began to dance again as if nothing ever happen.

I turned back to the guys and they looked at me.

"Let's go find Kendall."

It was five past ten and we still can't find Kendall. And with a mansion big as this one, it may be hours before we find him. So to save time we divided up; Carlos will look around on the first floor while Logan looks outside; as for me, I got the second floor.

A long hallway with endless doors on each side then another hallway at the end of this one.

"Well, here I go."

…

"How many bedrooms does Gustavo need?"

I've already checked at least fifth-teen so far and only found two teens making out. After apologizing for interrupting, I went back to searching the other rooms.

Each room seemed to have its own personality, with different colors and patterns. One with a deep shade of blue to a one with bright fire-engine red. Wow.

It was after the twenty-third, I decided to take a break and sit down.

_This is going to take forever._

I sighed.

"Kiley, can you help me, I know you're listening."

_What do you need help with, child?_

"Finding Kendall, he and Jo went off somewhere and now we can't find him."

_Maybe they don't want to found, James._

"But Jo went home, Kiley! Her father came and got her and Kendall wasn't with her."

_Maybe he went home._

I groan. No, he didn't go home. Mama Knight is supposed to pick up together.

"No, we think he's still here."

_Do you know where exactly?_

"No, I'm checking the second floor, while Carlos down stairs and Logan's outside."

_Maybe you should call out to him._

"How will that help; he might not even hear me." I lowered my head and gave out another sigh.

_You'll never know until you try. _

"Alright…" I grumbled, "Kendall!"

Nothing.

"See, I told you-"

_Listen! I think I hear him!_

"Nah, that's the two kids down in that bed room-"

_No, over there! In that bedroom next to the huge mirror._

I looked up and sure enough there it was, literally a huge mirror. And next to it was another fancy wooden door.

I got to my feet and ran to the door, my heart speeding as I got closer. And when I opened the door-

I found him.

He was lying on this huge king-sized bed with his shirt halfway unbuttoned and pants all the way down to his ankles. Plus he was unconscious.

"That little bitch…"

And next to the bed was an almost emptied bottle of wine. The smell of alcohol grew stronger as I came closer to the bed and the sight of Kendall grew more pitiful.

I can't believe it.

I just can't; how could she have the heart to do something like this?

To get Kendall drunk and take advantage of him? When he told her a million times he wasn't ready.

"Guess it's time to take you home." I pulled up his pants and fastened them, then went to button his shirt when a hand grabbed mine.

"James?"

I looked up at him and he was looking back at me. His cheeks were red from the alcohol. "What are you doing?'

Oh no, he doesn't think I did it, did he?

"Um buttoning y-your shirt…" I stuttered.

"Oh, okay." He giggled, and then closed his eyes again.

Oh yea, forgot he's drunk.

"Um Kendall, you need to get up, we have to go." Finishing buttoning his shirt.

"Go where?" he asked without opening his eyes.

"Home."

His eyes then opened and they looked at me. "Why?"

"You're drunk."

He laughed.

"No, I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

I bent down and grabbed the wine bottle. Leaning back up, I waved the bottled.

"Yes, you are."

He looked at the bottle and then back at me.

"But I didn-"

"Jo must have slipped it to you."

He sat up and took the bottle from me. "Why would she do that?"

Before I could answer, he let out a loud snarled and threw the bottle against the wall; it smashing into a thousands of shards. I jumped in fright.

"I told her no! I didn't want to- I wasn't- and she decides to go behind my back and do this?!" he jumped up and started to walk furiously around in circles, cursing to himself. I just sat there, watching. What was I supposed to do? Say 'oh, she didn't mean anything by it '?

When Kendall finally calmed down, he came back and sat next to me.

"You okay?" I asked.

"I'm not sure."

He looked at me and then smile.

"What?"

"You have pretty eyes."

What?

"Okay, you _are_ drunk." I blushed.

He laid his head on my shoulder and closed his eyes; I, on the other hand, had mine wide open and on him.

"Kendall, are you tired?"

"No."

He looked up at me, "Can I ask you something?"

"What?"

"Do you have a crush on me?"

(Kendall)

The sound of the door filled the room as I lay on the bed; I guess Jo is back with more punch.

"That little bitch…"

Huh? That didn't sound like Jo, who's here?

Go away.

I tried to sit up but I couldn't, I just didn't feel like it.

They walked across the room then stopped.

"Guess it's time to take you home."

Wait, I know that voice.

Suddenly, I felt my pants being tugged up, wait when did I take them off? And then fastened; then the buttons to my shirt…

I grabbed him before he could finish, my eyes opened to see him.

"James?"

He looked at me and I blushed red. His eyes are so pretty. "What are you doing?"

He looked guilty but also scared.

"Um buttoning y-your shirt…" he stuttered.

He looked so cute, like a lost puppy.

I giggled, "Oh, okay."

I closed my eyes from looking at him. I felt like a total idiot, why am I blushing so hard?

He went back to buttoning my shirt.

"Um Kendall, you need to get up, we have to go."

What? "Go where?"

"Home."

I opened my eyes and looked at him. "Why?"

I'm fine right here and didn't you want to try to be prom king?

"You're drunk."

I laughed.

"No, I'm not." I didn't drink any beer or anything.

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

He bent down to grab something and out from under the bed came a bottle.

A wine bottle.

"Yes, you are."

I looked at the bottle and then at him.

"But I didn't-"

"Jo must have slipped it to you."

I sat up and to the bottle from him, "Why would she do that?"

Then it hit me.

The punch; the one she's been giving me all night.

SHE WAS SPIKING MY FUCKING DRINK!

I let out a loud snarl and threw the bottle as hard as I could, it smashed against the wall and James jumped.

"I told her no! I didn't want to- I wasn't- and she decides to go behind my back and do this?!"

I jumped up from the bed and paced around room anglier.

"That backstabber! Little perv, I can't believe I loved her- I trusted her!"

I loved her and she does this to me?! She was going to-

Oh my god, she going to rape me.

That's it, we're over.

When I finally calm down; I went back to sit next to James.

"You okay?" he asked, he looked so worried.

"I'm not sure."

I'm not; I figured out my girlfriend tried to rape me. And now, James, the boy I like is here comforting me.

I look at him, his beautiful hazel eyes, and smiled.

"What?"

"You have pretty eyes." That was all I could say.

"Okay, you are drunk." His cheeks started to turn bright red.

I laid my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes. It felt good; he smelled good. Like cinnamon.

"Kendall, are you tired?"

"No."

I looked up at him, "can I ask you something?"

"What?"

"Do you have a crush on me?"

He just stared at me.

"James?"

"Um…"

I sat up again, keeping eye contact with him, I leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. He gasped.

I looked back up at him.

"Do you?"

CH11

(Logan)

Gustavo's garden was beautiful.

Flowers were everywhere; all roses.

A pathway led through them and to a fountain that lit up; a statue of a mermaid holding a shell up above her in the middle of it. The sound of water drifted through the air, making this a peaceful place.

But no Kendall.

I know Kendall is alright, he can take care of himself, but for James' sake I went looking for him.

"Kendall! Kendall come on man, where are you?" I yelled as I walked through garden but he never answered.

Knowing my luck, he's still inside, having time of his life while I'm out here searching for him. I sat down on the edge of the fountain, looking across the yard.

Nope, no one's out here but me.

I breathed in the flower scented air then closed my eyes.

"Man, I wished brought a book with me." I sighed, reopening my eyes, "this place is peace and quiet.

I began to stretch when a tiny sting went threw me, I winced.

Ever since the earthquake from earlier, I've been having this ache in my back. It really hurts. And what's strange is that nowhere else encountered it but us. I asked Mama Knight but she said she didn't feel anything.

And poor James; I can't believe what Wayne-Wayne did, saying things like that in front of everyone. I don't blame Carlos from getting so angry-

Carlos.

He was furious before the earthquake started and it stopped when he calmed down. This means he has the affinity earth. That just leaves air and water.

"Wow."

I looked at my watch. 10:34 p.m.

"Guess I should just go in, he isn't out here."

"Logan!"

I turned in the direction of were my name was being calling and saw Carlos running towards me.

Maybe he's found Kendall.

"Hey Carlos, did you fin-"

A sharp pain suddenly went down my spine; I cried out and went rigid before falling back into the fountain. Seconds later, water surrounds me. I tried to get up but the pain was too much. I screamed in agony which wouldn't matter since I was under water. No one can hear it.

"Carlos!' I pleaded.

Water filled my mouth and burned down my throat. I swung my arms and legs as hard as I could. My mind started to go fuzzy and my sight dimmed. The horrid pain wouldn't last long since I'm about to drown.

Another jolt went through me and I gave out another cry.

Please just let it end.

As I began to black out, Carlos pulled me out.

(Carlos)

I was running towards him when fell back into the fountain. He screamed in agony before he did, which made me run faster.

_Carlos, get him out before he drowns!_

"Got it!"

When I reach it, Logan was splashing water everywhere. I grabbed him by his arm and dragged him out. The entire time he was screaming; begging me to end it.

"Kiley, please help me! I don't know what to do!" I cried, wrapping Logan in my arms. Or at least trying to. Then he went silent.

"Logan?!"

_He just fainted, Carlos. He's fine._

"What happened?"

_I think he has one of the elements._

The wind blew harder, harsher than it should if you asked me, and wrapped us a warm grassy scent. It felt good.

_I think your element and his are combining to calm you._

"What? Our elements?"

_Yours is earth and he is air._

I looked down at Logan.

"Which leaves water."

(James)

"Do you?"

I stared at him in shock. Did he just kiss me? I touched my cheek with skepticism.

He laughed again.

"Well?"

"I…yes." I looked down at my lap, not wanting to look at his eyes, "for a long time."

"How long?" his tone didn't seem too harsh but it wasn't calm either.

"At least a year."

His hand reached up and grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him. He was smirking.

"And you kept this a secret for this long? No way." He cupped my face and caressed it gently; sending jolt of excitement threw my body.

Kendall cocked his head before leaning for another kiss; this time on my lips.

It wasn't anything I've ever dream before. His tongue snaked out to lick my lips before begging for entrance, which I allowed instantly. Then it explored everywhere, pressing against every sensitive spot he could find. I fought back with mine, our tongues tangled, fighting dominance. I was winning until Kendall pushed me back onto the bed, capturing my lips before I could even let out a yelp of surprise.

I grasped his shoulders and drew him closer as our kiss deepened. His fingers buried in my hair, pulling me closer to him. I moaned in in pleasure.

He pulled away, looking at me with lustful eyes.

"I want you."

He went to kiss me again but before his lips reached mine he let out a horrifying scream.


End file.
